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Looking but not Seeing

Looking but not Seeing

Why is it that we live most of our life and miss out on so much?
We are so busy with making money.
Trying to be better than the next fellow,
with the stuff that we have gotten.

We miss the really good things of life.
The smell of sweet flowers ,which we pass along our way.
The beauty of seeing butterflies in flight in the yard.
The joy our child has in playing with a ball.

Oh Why is it that we are so busy doing other things,
That we miss out on so much.

The wonder of just being able to hear, see and taste.
What would you do if we didn’t have these things?
Maybe we should ask someone that dose not have them.

What would it be like not to see your child sweet smiling face.
Why do we not see all the good things, that we have right in front of our faces if we just took the time to look.

Oh good people don’t you see it is time,
to enjoy  life and all the things that we have to the fullest.

Oh why do we take these things for granted?

If our life was to end this day.
We could not take our money, are all that we own with us.

So why do we make these things so important in our life.

Rose Patrick April 12,200
©All Right Reserved

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Comments


  • peluche
    August 25

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    The message of your poem is beautiful and they always turn out that way. You need to really concentrate more on verb tenses, punctuation, and grammar. You already have a great meaning in every piece. I can always tell it's something you have weighing directly on your heart. Believe it or not, you brought a tear to my eye. I know the day will come when I may go ahead of you to be with those already gone. But, you should always remember it will never be the last time you feel my love, maybe my face; but, never my love. It is eternal and never ending.


  • Amunet Wolfbane Moderators member
    October 12, 2008

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    I always enjoy the messages in your poetry and the real life quality of them. Anyone can step into this piece and feel it pertains to just them, when in reality it easily fits us all. Excellent piece Blesings, Gypsy


  • evilbatwoman
    April 12, 2008

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    I believe that unless this poem is speaking directly to someone you should change "life" to lives in the 2nd line. Again in the last line of the 1nd stanza "child" should be children unless you are speaking to someone you have a child with. "Dose" should be does in the last line of the fourth stanza. First line of the 5th stanza "child" should be child's. In the second to last stanza "are" should be or. Perhaps, the last punctuation should be a question mark, since it is asking a question.

    I really like the meaning of this poem. I completely agree. My mom hassles me all the time for doing this slowly. I only do them slowly to enjoy it. This is beautiful.


  • Jonathan Wikkins silver member
    April 12, 2008

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    great piece, but, you need to watch your word usage/spelling...

    example...

    "If our life was to end this day.
    We could not take our money, are all that we own with us."

    should be this...

    If our life were to end this day
    we could not take our money,
    or all that we own with us.

    just some suggestions, there's more that needs revising

    and it should be

    (c) Rose Patrick April 12, 2008
    All Rights Reserved

    too...

    some suggestions, there's more that needs to be done

    mike