There are intentions
stitched in the linings
of our conspiring bodies;
they rise
like the vapors of a scared whisper
and condense
on our convex skin.
We unfold
into consequences
that repeat themselves,
even when
they do not occur.
A contest entry
- Exercise your Want by ErrantHeart.
900 points, ended April 15, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - desires... by PrabhuDayal Khattar.
300 points, ended August 5, 2008, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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Humm..nice and curious views of the philosophy of life here...well done my friend....and my thanks for sharing it...
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frightful!
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I do love this very much. Short, sweet and deceptively unsimple. I've read it many times. Perhaps what may have tipped me toward the edge of some discomfiting is the "lining" concept, and wonder if 'aligning' might not better suit the "conspiring bodies". I trip on "lining" somewhat. And then I also felt it fell a little flat in the last two lines.
But I seriously did love this poem very much. -
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Thanks for the comment
The word "lining" has been deliberately used. As in the "lining" of clothes, not "aligning"
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Yes, well I did realize about the 'lining' thing, just thought aligning bodies was a better visual than stitches in body lining which would be, let's face it, skin. Well it's all good. I also noticed you changed 'happen' to 'occur'. I like that better too.
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short,sweet,simple.........amazing!
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