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Awakening for Seasons

Missing image

Alarm call signal beeps, wakes life to hope.
While vague, untidy heap stirs, seeking soap.
Above white sheets eyes peep –  ‘collide a scope’
Knaps excerpt from sleep's waves, attempts to cope
Extracts dream-echoes deep which telescope
Nano half-lives, fragile figments elope.
Isolated fragments salmon-surface grope
Now mid the mind’s adjustments, knot loose rope,
Glimpse anchors dreams yet keeps thoughts in their scope.
Flashes snow sheep show, recounted hope
Of t[r]apping spring of sleep... dream’s periscope.
Rise above life's challenge slope !
SEA-change awaits as crocus, once snowbound,
SONg sings which trees decks green, gifts green to ground.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

Acrostic Sonnet AWAKENING FOR SEASONS

Knap - to break off a stem

picture
http://flickr.com/photos/labimposter/423396234/

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Comments

  • beinbienasante silver member
    September 3
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    Isolated fragments salmon-surface grope

    SEA-change awaits as crocus, once snowbound,

    SONg sings which trees decks green, gifts green to ground.


    ^those are my favorite parts, they seem more life like/humanized than the others.

    . Rewarded 4


  • trista gold member
    April 27
    Edit | Reply
    Yep, must have been my browser...pic is showing fine today.

  • trista gold member
    April 26

    Edit | Reply
    I enjoyed both the imagery and rhyming of your poem, and the alliteration is nicely done too. I found "Flashes snow sheep show" to be a bit of a tongue twister when I read this out loud, but "s" sounds have a tendency to do that. Very creative using "sea" and "song" in your last 2 lines. I'm not crazy about seeing words repeated, like "green" in your last line, but it's a minor thing all considered. Oh ~ should "decks" perhaps be "deck"? Acrostics often have awkward transitions from line to line, but I think the rhyme really helps with that. I wish you could have posted the pic too, as it really compliments the poem well, but the link works just fine.

    Thanks so much for a lovely entry, and good luck in the contest!

    Best wishes,
    ~J.

    . Rewarded 8