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love cycle

diaphanous veils of woven moonbeams,
dancing with stars as two hearts become one.
luminous trails on a pillow of dreams,
ordained to be ours; cannot be undone.

the universe sings in sweet overtone
as the rising tide bows down at our feet.
synchronized hearts to a love metronome
as souls orchestrate and sorrows retreat.

yet every night ends and dreams disappear,
you open your eyes and get out of bed.
meanings of love become perfectly clear,
part of your heart, found another instead.

my fingers found air instead of your hand
and footsteps that leave, no mark on the sand.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

Option: A love so real

In a list

A contest entry

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 24 of 24

  • jo-el
    April 19, 2008

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    felt that first stanza quite a bit. learned a new word too lol. i like how you're true to initial impressions. love's first conclusion is all about permanence. and sadly the conclusion is undone in the end as the speaker finds that the love here was as difficult to grasp and hold onto as the woven moonbeams that introduce feeling. the last lines leave a lasting impression. wow....beautifully written.


  • second-born
    April 14, 2008

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    wow...truly this is one of the finest sonnets of yours that I've ever read...the choicest words, the nicest rhythm, and the most refined way to present the chosen theme...and surely this powerful piece could only be written by one of the greatest AP writers...


  • painfully amazing
    April 12, 2008

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    wow.. you never cease to amaze me =]
    i love you're writing
    and this is really good =]
    great write


  • creationsfromheart
    April 12, 2008

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    Aww once again Amera you have penned a write that has everything a great poem needs the flow is wonderful , the words are fab! And of course your style in form is remarkable!


  • PassionsPromise gold member
    April 11, 2008

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    Oh my darling this here was a most powerful piece full of thought and emotion. Totally weighs on the heart..I sit back with tears in my eyes and the sadness that embraces this sonnet. As always your the Queen of form and you nailed this one out of the ball park.

    I love you Amera

    Tory


  • HaleyMary
    April 11, 2008

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    This is so beautiful, Sis. I like the part of the universe sings in sweet overtone the best. It seemed to bring a spiritual aspect the poem, both in a way of describing love and feeling a sort of peacefulness in the soul or just life. Thanks for sharing and best of luck in the contest.


  • Poetry-and-rhyme
    April 11, 2008

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    sisss touching to the maxxxx i came and read this earlier today but i wasnt fully concentrating thats why i didnt comment untill i came again to read it again and think deep deep deep and dream abt what u were saying ur sonnet just rocksssssss i love it sis


  • Desire gold member
    April 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Oh My!!

    This is one Beauty of a piece You have versed and Love the words also the emotions
    Tight rhyme and Brilliant take on the prompt
    Love that form~~ You are gooooood

    the universe sings in sweet overtone
    as the rising tide, bows down at our feet.
    synchronized hearts to a love metronome
    as souls orchestrate and sorrows retreat.
    Tugs at the Heartstrings

    Thank You for sharing Your Heart and Spirit~
    Many blessings to You in the contest Sweet Soul
    Best wishes too
    and much love~ Desire~*~


  • moonbumps silver member
    April 11, 2008

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    So many lines I could pick to tell you how they get to me-
    Amazing write this-
    Love Hilly


  • everyone1 gold member
    April 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Oh... and I feel...

    I am listening to "Raining in Boltimore" right now as I write this... by the " Counting Crows"...

    I read this... and I can feel...


    God knows how I feel for you...

    Pain is the loss of love, and the certainty that it will never be forgotten, thereby never truly lost...

    God... knows, now I can feel...

    What emotion, given and as the passion kept me with every word...

    You give me hope Amera... because now I can feel...

    You are so dear, and so precious and do not deserve anything but a lasting love... God bring it to you... God bring it to you...

    God, I pray He come and bring it to you...

    This was the most passionate poem I have ever had the gift of reading...

    ... because now again I can feel...

    ~ James ~


  • Faeryn
    April 11, 2008

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    Like all your other sonnets, this poem is amazing. I love the ending couplet.
    "and footsteps that leave no mark on the sand"
    That line is so powerful.
    Love,
    Tay


  • myrataal silver member
    April 11, 2008

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    What a beautiful sonnet ...

    and marveling in its splendour, one may miss the depth of sorrow. You write with such ease and insight, Poetess. Not even tears can blind your poetic eye.



    Love
    Myra


  • PerVirtuous
    April 11, 2008

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    This is an amazing and beautiful write. Even as it breaks my heart I am amazed with the beauty is speaks. You are the Princess of sonnets. This is a masterpiece.


  • Cup-a-Joe
    April 11, 2008
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    Nice.
    *HUG*
    Joe


  • Dalaney gold member
    April 11, 2008
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    this is sad, beautiful, amazing.
    Love, Lane


  • And Hyetal
    April 11, 2008

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    Wow. This is absolutely one of my favorites by you. How DO you do it?

    The whole theme was just perfect and the way you wrote this was amazing. The last two lines were stunning.

    amazing!


    ~Cassie

    PS: This is going on my bookmark list for sure.


  • cricketjeff gold member
    April 11, 2008

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    The lack of love on waking is so familiar to so many here I am sure, and your sonnet (in a modern complex meter) beautifully highlights the contrast between the perfection in dreams and the mundane reality. A lovely poem.

  • Papagallo
    April 11, 2008

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    Your ending here is so sad and yet so true. Your last two lines were the saddest. It is always a pleasure to read your work. Best of luck in the contest.


  • JohnnyD gold member
    April 11, 2008

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    A wellw ritten tale of an universal love cycle and how it turns out depends on what both parties throw into the tub. Right now mine is on slow spin but I'm afraid I tossed in too much softener and the controls are stck on eternal slow spin and my box of dryer sheets is empty?

    Damn, time to go find another laudromat, know any good ones?



    Dad


  • Mairi bheag gold member
    April 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is pretty good, Sis. This kind of rhythm can compliment a sonnet very well (although beware! It can also cause it to be chopped into bites). There are a couple of lines with an extra syllable, but that doesn't matter at all, because they actually keep the rhythm rippling.

    The couplet lifts the whole thing to another level.

    Very good work - I hope it does well in the contest.


  • Bazza
    April 11, 2008
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    A poignant love story that entices a sadness to overcome the reader until the final ending.


  • Rebekah-Ann silver member
    April 11, 2008

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    ag no Amera!!! There you go and have me crying all over again!!! This is so beautiful! and at the moment exactly how I feel. It's like you tap into my thoughts and write that wich I cannot express! I simply love the Sonnet! It was flawless and beautiful! Thank you for entering my contest and that you have woven such a beautiful piece, I look at the words and it looks like golden threads just tieng me to this page!

    VERY WELL DONE!!!

    Becks ♥♥♥


  • MJ Donnelly gold member
    April 11, 2008

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    A most masterful diction and form dear Amera, like only you can pen. Best of luck in the contest dear.


    Love and peace always,
    mj.

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