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Red Mud

'Should we call this art?
This red spot on this paper?'
The teacher once said as I held
the brush within my right hand..

I looked at him with a smile and said
'I am not finished ,so why do you judge,
this here splodge? Once I am done then
you can judge,but this is my pride and joy
This splendiferous piece of red mud'

After the class was over the teacher made his rounds,
he came back to the one that left him in a frown..
He saw what the student had made,he turned to me and said it is not done..
I smiled at the teacher and said it is not done because I have yet not found the one who can see the beauty in me..They all see what you see..
Just something to be judge this piece of red mud...








Author notes

20 poets
20 lines

And 20 lines it is..

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • kiwigirljacks gold member
    April 29, 2008

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    Sigh... what a story! Not being seen for your heart is a terrible thing!! To be made to feel like that splodge of red mud. No one deserves that and it is hearts and souls that should be observed!!

    I can also relate to this write in another way... of always been seen only for what is the exterior and few taking the time to see what is underneath...

    This is just amazing!!


  • Whispering Wind Moderators member
    April 15, 2008

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    an outstanding message you have flowing from your pen...how we all long to be seen for who we really are...niaish so much for entering and for sharing with me


  • Unsigned gold member
    April 12, 2008

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    Hey sis...thanks for the entry..I love it...you have told me stories from your childhood before and this is a new one for me...Excellent...

    Simon

  • almostgone
    April 11, 2008

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    this is a most excellent poem....great style and finish to it. i enjoyed the expression of the moral in this story....we are all different, unique, diamonds in the rough if you will...and the world would be a much better place if all people saw us for who we are, unmolded, and sometimes flawed....rather than believing in what others see us as.
    truly an awesome write.
    " I have yet not found the one who can see the beauty in me"
    truly profound! best of luck!

  • imahealer
    April 11, 2008

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    Wonderful poem on the prompt. I loved the moral to this poem. How very true. Is "splodge" a word, and what is it's meaning. I can understand that you are not English speaking, so I had to interpret what you meant. I wish you would take this poem back to the edit page, work on the correct spelling, and the correct words. Your write would have a really great chance of placing, if only you could get someone to help you edit. I loved your style. Best wishes.

    Shana

    • Angelflower
      April 11, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you very much.. I'm glad that you liked it? And yes "splodge" is a word, its an irregular spot or blotch in other words.. And yes I am English speaking, itis my first language, I just don't speak it like everyone else does.. But as long as you get the moral of this poem then thats all that matters to me.. Well if I didn't place then oh well.. Thanks again for your comment.
      J.


  • buffsab99
    April 11, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Excellent

    Beautiful take on the prompt my friend. I love how it played out.

1 - 9 of 9