Cardboard Mask
A smile held tightly
Tied in place
By hangman’s knots
Hung upon the ears
Hides the fragile self
Alone, in those darkest places
Laughter ripples
On the breeze
Of daily conversation
Words fall like leaves
From outstretched autumn branches
Dry, brittle
Bereft of meaning,
They crumble beneath careless feet
Hollow smile stretches wider
Stemming words of careless disclosure
The day grinds down.
Flame washed skies
Of restful promise
Bring no ease for those
Sleepless in isolation
Twisted, turning
Tangled in the bindings
Of nights imagination
The spawn of unuttered thoughts
Caper in contorted play,
Unguarded they dance in the mind
Moonlight falls
Through shuttered eyes
Refracted lustre
Of a wild pearl hung
Suspended against the black
Velvet backdrop of sky,
The gentle light seems innocent of the day
I lay my head
Upon the cool window sill
Let my thoughts wander
Loose upon the quiet
Whispered doubts
Confusion
Fear of futures unknown
Pale moonlight reflections
Suspended in crystal tears
Trace the day's etchings
Engraved upon my face
Chaotic conceptions are
Soothed into weariness,
I sleep in isolation
Alone, the moon illuminates the night
Complete in its solitude
Author notes
This was written in reference to the isolation experienced by people living with pain in their lives that they feel they can not share with others.
A contest entry
- Show me how good you really are. by EntombedCrystalRose.
300 points, ended April 22, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
-
beautiful work
This poem really expresses isolation and confusion well, I especially identified with this part
I lay my head
Upon the cool window sill
Let my thoughts wander
Loose upon the quiet
Whispered doubts
Confusion
Fear of futures unknown
-
Amazing
I love the way you intertwined imagery and emotion in this poem. You gave me something to look at and something to feel at the same time. I really like that.
The emotions are well represented as well. They have movements and motions when you pair them with the physical images, and it creates a marvelous effect.
Well done!
-
the fear ,confusion and loneliness well brought out with powerful expressions...nice poem
-
A wonderful piece of poetry that was just oozing imagery. Thank you for entering!
-
Your poem captured well the sense of isolation that can be felt by sensitive people unable by circumstance to communicate. The images are clear and sad, words used sparsely to good effect. I liked particularly /black velvet backdrop/ and /I sleep in isolation/
-
The day grinds down.
Flame washed skies
Of restful promise
Bring no ease for those
Sleepless in isolation
--This verse truly sums up this piece for me...when I read these words a smile of understanding came to my face.
The imgaery here is quite breathtaking...I enjoy the way that the tempo is kept high through the reading and the way that the tone is maintained throughout. Bravo!
-
Superb
Marvelous, I can relate to this one quite well, and from reading it I'm sure that both psychological pain as well as physical pain is being referenced therein.
Quite well written, indeed. -
great!!!
I really liked it. It was sincere and descriptive. though it was long it got the point through. but I don't get why its called conversing with the moon. -
Outstanding!
Bravo my fellow poet! This was a beautifully
expressed piece that dealt with a sad subject.
What can be more painful than isolation.
The creator understood this ideal and made
man a help mate. Someone with whom he could
share himself with in everything. To live in
a world as magnificent as this without being
able to communicate the wonders of living is
worst than death. I applaud your sensitivity
toward this tragic reality of life. Bravo!
-
So many keep pain deep inside and never let others share or help them. They seem to withdraw more and more - get very depressed and go into a slump where they are hardly noticable. Sad situation. Well written describing this. Liked the ending to this poem. Fitting conclusion.
-
Stupendous work
The empathy is amazing here; I suspect the poet has had bouts with loneliness, as have all true poets: pain and loneliness is a sort of official ID card for some of us; the poetry is well balanced and just exactly what the reader needs to keep moving towards to final rest and oblivion of much desired peace... Great job... DW
-
there is nothing more painful to the wearer than a fake smile, which you capture so poignantly in your words...
A smile held tightly
tied in place
by hangman's knots
A very insightful write into the desolation that loneliness brings and the anquish it can cause.
well done
Adding your comment:
1 - 12 of 12
