You fly by as if you don't see the pain
The pain Darks have caused the Lights
In a war that is hopefully completely over
Your castle is torn down
It must be rebuilt
Will the others accept you as king?
Or will they turn their backs
Knowing you deserted them
When they needed you most?
The waves crash against your cliff
YOUR cliff
Where your castle used to stand
Tall and proud
With your dad as king
You suck it all up
The pain, fear, and anger
Landing, you roar
For your people to come
"Will you help me?" you ask them
And their answer surprises you
"Of course, our king.
For you, anything."
Author notes
Welcome, back, King Dragon
A contest entry
- Titles Are Us - April Contest by CitrineSunrise.
900 points, ended April 20, 2008, 4 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - round one (for everyone) prewrite contest ENTER ENTER ENTER (AND YES THAT MEAN'S YOU too by serenity silvermoon.
927 points, ended February 16, 1509 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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nice
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Marie, This was a very different take than I would have thought of for the picture. That is why we are all unique and I found it very interesting. I love the feeling of hope as the King received such a resounding welcome. The kingdom will surely be rebuilt. Liz did make some good points that would make this even more marvelous. I have learned from her lessons. She must be a wonderful teacher for her students. She tries to bring out the best in all of us and she is honest. Thank you for sharing with all of us and congratulations on the Honorable Mention you received. I'm very happy that you took part in the contest. One hint, don't forget your screen name in the notes or at the end of the poem next time.
Keep that ink flowing. Love and God bless, Joyce 
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This was a very intriguing poem. I am unsure if it is based on an established story or video game but one does not need to know the origin to appreciate the message. My only objection was to the pacing. With no line breaks the reader rushes on at a frantic speed. I think you could have emphasized some of your thoughts with a careful use of formatting and line breaks. I also do not know who wrote this poem as you did not include your name in the author's notes. I will assume you are eligible to compete in this contest. Thank you for your entry. Peace, Liz
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I am not an expert at poetry, neither do I call myself a poet, but I do attempt to write what I perceive or from the sounds within my heart. Within you poem - a story - you have taught a lesson [to my perception of your poem] forgiveness. Being desserted and then called upon to re-build the kingdom, can not be any other than forgiveness. Your poem reflects so much of this world - in ruins we are, broken by pride and greed, but there is yearning to rebuild. I would use a few line breaks to strengthen the poem's gist. However, after reading it on various occasions, I have come to enjoy what you have written. Frans.
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