In aqua blue rolled tightly
ivory cream upon each crest
pebbled beach marks mystery;
journeyed footprints scar it best.
Tide to shore and back again;
washed desires to the sand.
Touches fleeting on the wind
in the ocean's mighty hand.
With clarity and essence,
inner secrets honed to grow
the power of love's true light,
is a lifelong ebb and flow.
Author notes
Prompt: Ebb
A contest entry
- Ebb by Mirthryl.
1050 points, ended April 21, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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This a stunning penning for sure
I love the imagery you put within this poem
And the rhyme is fantastic
10 out of 10 truly wonderful.
Tony
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This is a brief little rhmye but it gives one alot to think about... It does take the ebb and flow of a lifetime to hone our perceptions enough to shine the light upon true love if and when we find it!!! A truly lovely piece...
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very nice write, I love the background and the poem fit the prompt. Lovely images. Thanks for sharing.
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This is lovely..the message and imagery as soothing as the backdrop. Good luck in the contest.
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Very nice imagery in the first stanza! A sense of the ocean caressing the shore in the second. I don't think I'm understanding your intent in the third stanza, as "essence", "honed to grow", and "love's true light" all make me think of a direction of steady increase and growth, rather than "a lifelong ebb and flow", unless you may be pondering the ups and downs of life that come to all relationships? That might also fit with the ideas of "clarity and essence" and "inner secrets" of growing appreciation. Love your background, so fitting for this write!
Thank you for your thoughts, and for your entry in my contest!
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Just excellent
Back ground, rhyme, rhythm all perfect with good metaphore and flow.
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excellent rhyme Pam melded into a beautiful metaphor.
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Ah, beautiful metaphor paired with graceful rhyme. A joy to read!
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Ah yes, "The power of loves true light".Powerful words that hit the nail right on the head.This poem is crammed full of delicious imagery and I loved reading it, Ros
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Wonderfully written; this flows so well; beautiful language and imagery. Loved this Pam.
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dee23
a very desceiption poem, like a picture I could see it.
perfect rhyme and rhymth,
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Gorgeous imagery and metaphor. This piece flows perfectly and the rhyme was a very well done. A marvelous work!
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i agree with paul, and with the soft rhyme and flow of the words themselves... it is as if i am caught in that tide... or maybe i dream of it...
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This has such a strong metaphor the way you interweaved it into the theme makes it a very enjoyable read indeed.
Paul
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