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Cycles and circles

 

 

                                                    

 

 

 

It's rising of dawn in splendor

robbed by the harsh sunlight of high noon,

the symphony of the morning bird;

long forgotten by mid-day hustle and bustle

the sun now cast long shadows upon drab tenements

and humanity at its worst[morning birds have sought refuge]

hiding in the highest trees -their song long ago stilled

by the chaos below-their voices choked out,

exhaust and pollution, poisonous elixir of mankind.

 

 

Tired grew the day that started in such beauty;

[tranquility of early mourn] serenity interrupted,

impatiently it waited for dusk, the forgiving obscurity

night time shadows that soften-garish light of the day;

and the milky white moon and a thousand stars illuminate

a world of illusions below-all is not what it seems to be;

tenderly they touched in passing [when the day met the night]

each knowing that they could not co-exist,

yet separately they belonged together;

for the world must turn in circles and cycles

and where there is light there will be dark,

until once again dark makes way for the light of Dawn;

for the fresh dew upon grass and the chirp of the morning bird of song.

 

 

 

Author notes

I am obviously not familiar with the song...but was driven to write down the thoughts that came to mind. Please be curteous but honest in your comments,
thank you

A contest entry

any critique is very welcome [as long as it is done with courtesy and constructive to my learning. I thank you.

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • waydownuponjoy
    December 3, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    just my cup of tea ...

    for this morning, before the dawn, after the dreams. I woke early and was thinking about you, where you've been? why I haven't seen you about the site ... I don't know why these questions popped into my head but they did! So I thought I'd browse a poem of yours and then say Hello friend. This title grabbled my attention and it was the perfect one for my morning! Thank you,

    jy

  • myagirl
    August 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I'm not sure I can add to your learning, being new at this, but I enjoyed this poem immensely, it was moving and beautiful.


    • cherche -d -ame
      August 5, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      thank you for reading me , as well as for your vote of confidence. You say that you are new at this...remember every single writer is new at one time, however the talent has always been there as well as the urge to write, therefore NEW only applies to the writing----not the thought process
      best wishes to you,
      reenie
      PS I am currently hosting a contest for big points. You might want to consider an entry?


  • Blushfulmoon silver member
    May 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    beautiful~

    Wow
    Such a beautiful poem you have penned here sis
    Love the imagery in this one and that pic is awesome
    Best of luck in the contest....
    Hugs
    Susan~~~


  • tomisb
    April 9, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    We begin in so much hope. You catch this well. We lose our vision when faced with the reality of the task. Still some of us remember the dream, i.e. the bird's songs in the morning.

    You catch, as is your wont, the beauty and how it crashes against the ugliness of man's less than glorious mess. You hold out a prayer and a hope that we can reach deeper into the dream and create from our best to heal the waste.

    Love,
    Tom B.


  • NurseChilly gold member
    April 9, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    the call of morning and the calls of life and love... Reenie this is just a softness to the ears my friend, a beautiful piece

    very nice

    G.x


  • ixtli
    April 8, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is beautiful! I'm actually glad that someone wrote a poem using just the prompt, without knowing the song. Knowing too much can inhibit the imagination and cause limits to be set. Nice job! Good luck in the contest and thanks for entering!


  • JohnnyD gold member
    April 8, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    When the sun is swallowed by the horizon is it an act of celestial impregnation giving birth to the moon and stars? I wonder???

    lovely, melodic poem...but I think I need an attorny to fend of a starternity suit?????? Damn, I miss my little moonbeam...

    LOL



    Len

1 - 8 of 8