In the pinball shifts of missing fingerprints,
I find rhythm
in my nods of assent
as he moonwalks goodbye.
(they say I've learned my lesson.)
soaking up syllables,
I
drip
wet
shivers
to distract from too tight an embrace,
because
it just so happens,
if he wrung me dry,
you might be all that's left over.
sketches of your name
flashing: G-A-M-E-O-V-E-R
& there's not enough change in my pocket
to secure a second life.
Author notes
AngieMae
from prompt: arcade
this is what comes to me during math midterm review.
title is most likely inappropriate, but it's what felt right to me, so I left it
this is more real than anything I've written lately, but I just hope it's relatable.
A contest entry
- project poetry season one [first round] by blackday.
600 points, ended April 23, 2008, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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The arcade use was really nice. Sorry my comment is going to be somewhat sort, but you'll forgive me.
The game over, I found a bit cliche just because it's kinn of... the obvious, I guess?
But your counting syllables. That... that line was so good. I love it. I wish I would have thought of that. haha -
The arcade use was really nice. Sorry my comment is going to be somewhat sort, but you'll forgive me.
The game over, I found a bit cliche just because it's kinn of... the obvious, I guess?
But your counting syllables. That... that line was so good. I love it. I wish I would have thought of that. haha
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relatable indeed.
i'm kind of disappointed that we both used 'pinball' - hopefully that won't be held against us in judging, because how would have we known that either of us were going to use it, right?
man, i worry over the dumbest stuff.
haha
but yeah,
good luck.
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ok so I totally see the arcade part.... but i dont really see how the middle relates to the prompt or with the theme you have going with the beginning and end.... but it was good.... good luck in the contest! Meg
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- 3rd line, 'a' should be 'an'
- 11th line, it might flow better if you move 'an' to after 'from' - of course, changing it to 'a'
I may have made no sense whatsoever
I love maths!
I'm sorry this is a real life experience for you, and I'm not sure if I fully relate. I like to believe that I don't =] Your ending was the best in my opinion - tied it all together and had a punch
Never ♥
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Thanks for pointing out the part in the 3rd line, I didn't even mean to have an article there, lol.
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*hate
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math sucks!!!! i hare math... i like the title. would love it without the brackets
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nice work
I am glad math comes easy to you LOL! Dont worry about your title it just gets more people to read your work
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actually math does not come easy to me and this subsequently has nothing to do with math
thanks for your comment
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