Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

A Pane of Glass

 

a pane of glass

can never bend

or be swayed

into another shape

 

it is transparent

no shame or regret

in letting other’s see in

 

when pushed too far

like a Cobra with a tongue of acid

the argument will never be won

 

yet the ego is crushed so easily

and the glass is tempted to shatter

Author notes

Autobiography for contest.

BE HONEST,,,, I will not be offended.

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 17 of 17

  • DeGraw
    June 28, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Transparently Good!

    I love this poem. So transparently and simply comprehended! Your use of words is superb! The ego is indeed fragile and your comparison to glass is perfect. How appropriate on a site where we constantly put our egos on the line with every line we write!
    Keep up the great work,
    Regards,
    DeGraw


  • Livingemptyspaces
    June 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I really like this flowing metaphor. It's beautiful, and you did a great job. Good luck and keep on writing!

    -Les


  • bozoloper
    May 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    i enjoy the glass image (or transparency, as the case may be). i like the idea of being "swayed" into another shape, it's an interesting use of the word, it emphasizes the brittleness of the glass. i like this a lot, i can't believe i didn't read it before!


  • kiwigirljacks gold member
    April 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Ok WOW... another I can relate to!! Stunning metaphor and such depth to this write...

    I am bookmarking this for sure!!


  • Randomly Beautiful
    April 24, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I appreciate your time in entering my contest. :f


  • jcat gold member
    April 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    What an incredible piece!!! I love how you compare yourself to a pane of glass. How ingenious is that?? Yes I would think that we are alot like panes of glass if we chose to be....letting people glance inside to see the beauty held within. Very well said and best of luck


  • worshipchick
    April 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I really, really like how you used glass as your metaphor. I especially like the second stanza- though this is true for so few people! Good write :-)


  • james119
    April 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    very interesting approach to this analogy.
    I like it for it's forthrightness and clarity.
    last two lines... ain't it the truth!!

    an aside:
    glass, when handled with respect, heated gently and cooled properly, will bend beautifully.

  • hmmmmmmm
    April 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Like it!

    On my first impression I was a bit confused but then it all kinda sunk in if that makes sense. Liking the metaphor. "like a Cobra with a tongue of acid, the argument will never be won" really sums everythung up.


  • Perception
    April 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Hm. I like this idea. Its very interesting. It had me thinking.... My mind sliding through your lines. It flowed very well... And gave me some interesting images... and thoughts.

    Good job, poet,
    wonderfully penned


  • SomeonesToySoldier gold member
    April 6, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Its could be just my simple mind but i had a little trouble following the poem there in the middle. The flow of it is good though. I'll come back and read it again at a later time maybe its just that's it really late here and my brain is tired.

1 - 17 of 17