I can feel the abyss
Tugging at the ends of reason
Where ends don’t meet
And crying gives me the will to live
(These tears are my reason to die)
And each breath is a chaotic gasp,
Muscle contractions as I struggle to breathe.
Sobs wrack my body like a contortionist’s
On fire
This knife should be the end of everything,
But it’s just the end of my beating heart.
I leave behind misery in my wake,
The thousands of flesh-and-bone
Tearstained wraiths
Not brave enough to end it all
Tonight of all nights
I make this choice
Crying gives me the will to live
(I’m alive)
And these tears give me will to die
(This cold can’t be alive)
And I don’t know what to do.
Author notes
No idea.
A contest entry
- Scream by infernalxfidelity.
698 points, ended April 8, 2008, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Personal, Quote, Life, Message
Comments
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nice. it's sad, but it's pretty good.
good luck!
~S-H-O -
This is screaming, the abyss with the ends of reason that don't meet, liked that phraseology very much indeed. Maybe muscle contractions could also work as muscles contract but that is simply a perspective shared and not a criticism. Liked the reference to contortionist's, emotions this deep do contort the face and insides with the need to scream and weep, contortionist's has more of a twisted edge. The last stanza gave this a lyrical feel, it would work well as a hook line if these words were put to music.
Many people have concerns about emo poetry/songs they worry that accepting the topic/discussion of the emotional abyss that leads to suicidal thoughts may be encouraging it. Perhaps if more teenagers could pour their pain out onto pages it would be cathartic for them , a way of purging these emotions and by the very act of trying to shape thoughts poetically the conscious part of the brain is trying to shape and make sense of what, often, does not make sense to those with these feelings.
This reminded somewhat of that track by The Rasmus, wish I could recall the title, but the lyrics are along the lines of I have been waiting all my life to get rid of this cancer, I must look through my cd's later as I have it somewhere.
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Luv it
I dont know what I like about it. I think its the way you use all those words lol but I just really love it. Kinda reminds me of when I want to kill myself but Im too afraid to do it.
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