Fits so neatly in a box
Those god-awful clocks
Keep me awake
And I don't need you
I don't need anyone
To tell me what it takes
Flowing through my veins
A blackbird holding on
To it's mistakes
When we leave here
Will it be you I fear
I guess I'll find out
What it's all about
And will you take me away?
Hide so easily in books
But my world never shook
The way it should've done
I stand here screaming out
What is it all about?
Tell me I'm your son
Running through my head
A blackbird is lead
Into the sun
When we leave this place
Will it be with grace?
Like a blackbird in flight
And will you take me away?
And would you take my hand?
And lead me through all of this
Would you grant me one more wish?
And would you promise me that
And make me disappear
Would you take me out of here
Pumping through my heart
A blackbird is burning
On the final frontier
When I leave my home
Will I be all alone
I guess I won't know
Until I up and go
And will you take me away?
Author notes
Prompt: Clocks
I wrote this about a friend who thought that her biological clock was ticking loudly. It seemed to consume her whole existence. I hope you like it.
A contest entry
- In The Soul by whatever666.
600 points, ended April 15, 2008, 35 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - OPTIONS-sets of 10 by XxPrinc3ssMaraxX.
600 points, ended June 6, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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That was interesting, raw and simple. Very nice.
Thankyou for entering my contest and best of luck.
peace
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I want to be taken away. This has such a deep romance to it. And not the love romance... but just some imaginative, creative, fantastical romance. I can't explain it, but it's very beautiful. A lot of the lines really stuck to me, and I love the constant theme of a blackbird.


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oh my this is good
wow, this is way different from all the others i have read. i think of the Crow movies when i read this. but this is really, really good. thank you for entering -
I really like this... it is different from your other songs - I like the imagery that you have used in this, it is wonderful... I really like the 'and will you take me away' refrain... the rhyming is interesting - and I would love to hear the music that goes with it
amazing write - I hope you do well in the contest
Keep writing
Polly

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i think that this will make a wonderful song. it just kind of has that quality to it

i like the imagery of clocks in the first stanza. i like the motif of the blackbird, it is unique, and the name of the bird sort of illustrates the emotions that you are feeling.
great write and good luck in the contest!

1 - 5 of 5





