I woke up
and I upchucked
rinsed my mouth with
sin forgiving soap
poured another drink
and praised the lord
then met the pope
we had a dinner date at eight
and I was late
but he still waited...
so that he could
chastise me in like;
twenty different languages!
and now I am confused
more than before because
i'm un-religious?
although sometimes I pee
religiously while
spilling slurs...
and so I sit
on potty bound
and speaketh not a sound;
for I am wasted
and once again
I am unable to defend
this wisdom
as inner
backstroke genius drowns within
this
plight unsettled swim
Author notes
Ok, this really is true...
when related metaphorically
A contest entry
- THE SATURDAY NIGHT PARTY [challenge] [tonight] by Ryno.
300 points, ended April 7, 2008, 7 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Holy cow, we both wrote religious pieces for this contest.
I'm not seeing the metaphor (I'm blonde like that
), but this was really well written and powerful, I enjoyed it anyway. ^.^
or WAS religion the metaphor?
Anyways, awesome write here, congrats on the HM.
~Cassie
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I guess you could say it's a metaphor for un-religion if that were really a word... lol
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ah, I get it now.
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liked reading this aloud. you've done well with the sounds. the content is also very good. as in, i liked it. sorry, sometimes i sound stupider than usual.
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I love your Muse...
and the way your mind works...
somehow you sling ink with such ease that has such a biting edge...
love this write...
been there done that...LOL!
this is a far better write than most will recognize handsome...
Blessings! Tammy
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This was really well done. I like how you managed to turn the situation into a metaphor; took a lot of skill to do that.
It has really basic imagery which could be strong, but it still tells the story strongly; so its still defiantly what I asked for.
This is an interesting topic and I loved the power behind your words and the contradictons. Worshiping while one is drunk?
Very well written. Thank-you for your entry. -
tasty...sounds like a helluva night. this was a fun read, although i sympathize with the inspiration...well done
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