They meet each night on the Ocean Isle pier
on a bench only slightly older than they.
He brings the coffee, she brings the leftovers
from the supper she'd cooked her husband that day.
He pours her a cup, they throw unbaited hooks
into the surging surf of Carolina Bay.
They sit on their bench and rock with the rhythm
of the pier moving with dark water below.
They speak of her day of being nurse to her mate
whose last lucid thought was 10 years ago.
He listens quietly, his eyes full of her face
as she shares the hurt of a man dying slow.
The man feels her pain, his own loss in his past,
when his wife went to her place in the sun.
This old lady was his hold on a world gone so wrong
when the cancer finally ended its long run.
Now he listens as she cries to a unfeeling God above
for an end to the grief for her loved one.
So once again they share their supper and thoughts
as the night gives them comfort and relief.
True love has no rules; they find in the other
a means for their spirits to perceive
that life has a meaning beyond all the pain;
in each other they find a way to believe.
Night folk come and go, but no one disturbs
their bubble of peace on the pier.
For fishing folk know the lady and old man
meeting late every night of the year.
No business of theirs, they tend to their lines
and doze as the morning draws near.
Author notes
This is a difficult poem for me to categorize. The inspiration was an old couple alone on a pier in the dead of night. I left them alone.
- The Prompt Coffee House group list • next in list
A contest entry
- Inspire me; Anything Goes by wolfcub.
450 points, ended April 16, 2008, 54 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - PLEASE! Help me get rid of my points! by Shenanigans.
1000 points, ended May 19, 2008, 36 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Special contest for those who previously entered my other contest. by penman.
1000 points, ended April 12, 2008, 9 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Convert your Bronze to Gold by BearWoman.
1500 points, ended June 24, 22 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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I love the soft wisdom that rides on the pulsing undercurrent of pain in this piece. I would categorize it as "spiritual". I very much like the story you have created here (in part because I have been dealing with end of life issues for many months, and have a parent whose partner has been deteriorating with Alzheimers for several years). One minor tweak: "it's long run." -> its The wording and flow of this piece are an integral part of creating the tone of this finely cohesive write. I don't know your personal story; though I can see your wisdom shine through this piece. Thank you very much for this entry.
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Judge
Your poem has trophies so it is not eligible
for this contest. Sorry.
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interesting write .. true life episodes . . nicely done
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This is very creative and I love the sweet compassion within the words. These lines are amazing: "True love has no rules; they find in the other / a means for their spirits to perceive / that life has a meaning beyond all the pain; / In each other they find a way to believe." You write very well and I enjoyed reading this poem. Thank you so much for entering my contest
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very nice. i can picture the couple. thanks for entering
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thank you for entering! sorry that it took so long to comment! this is a great poem! you did a nice job! good luck!
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I like this it's really well written....and a very good story...and I could see how it would be hard to label...very well written...I will keep you posted...I'm not adding to the finalist list right now...
~*~An Unwritten Truth~*~ -
i can relate to this in so many ways that it's not funny. i think you've done a very good job in telling their story and showing compassion. i enjoyed this
thank you for entering and best of luck
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butifuly wrote and very touching
x cheeky x
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This reminds me of The Notebook. It's sweet.
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That is a high compliment. I bawl like a baby (in private) every time I see "The Notebook".
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Wonderful
Very well done. Best of luck in the contest.
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huh, very cool. I like how it's "Love" but not in the clandestine cheating on a beach way.... more like a very deep friendship. This is a really well written poem, you convey the scene with few direct images but enough well-placed words for readers to picture it in their own minds. I like this a lot, great work, and good luck in the contest!
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This is really touching. It's amazing how seemingly little things can inspire us to create such works of art. Well done
Thankyou for entering and good luck
Katie -
This is my kind of poem, a beautiful story beautifully told and I wish I had written it.
For me, this has to be one of the best poems of yours that I have read and I'm happy that you decided to leave them undisturbed.
All the best..Sue
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When your on, 'your on'
At first I thought this was going to be about a woman having an affair, but as the story grew, it became a touching love story. This was so sad and sweet. She appears still loyal to her husband, but still has found a new love through companionship. Loving two men at once... This flows so smoothly that I didn't realize it was a rhyme, only after I reread it, did I notice. One of the best that I've seen.
"on a bench only slightly older than they.
He brings the coffee, she brings the leftovers"
This is why you have more gold than I.lol jen
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I have seen people like this...
This poem has everything I like in poetry -
story, beautiful image, a good flow line.
One of my favorite by you. Love, Lane
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