under
blue skies,
from a towel
on sand
with my
finger
I nudge
the idle clouds
to welcome
the sun
A contest entry
- Quickie by azure85.
550 points, ended April 5, 2008, 14 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
-
Wonderful little poem!
I can see why it won the gold!
More than ever I seem to crave the sun...just give me the sun!

-
Excellent
under
blue skies,
from a towel
on sand
with my
finger
I nudge
the idle clouds
to welcome
the sun...
so compact and simple yet full of imagery, the feeling it evokes to the readers mind leaves beyond imagination. Congrats on the gold my dear
under
blue skies,
from nowhere
you came
unexpectedly
with my
vivid imagination
I trace
the contours
of your image
to my minds eyes
you are such
a beautiful specie
to behold...sweet sorrow (rose tattoo)


-
I can just see you lying on the beach, tanning yourself, and pushing the clouds away. You are so talented. So few words. A picture painted. Congratulations on gold, (for the one who gets no respect! LOL

Shana

-
Many poems I comment on being too wordy, definitely this one is not one of those. The is a simple poem, yet you filled it wiht images that take you away to a forgotten land. This is a really nice poem and I enjoyed reading it.

-
Such nice images with your poem, I very much enjoyed "nudge the idle clouds!" May the sun shine for you today, thank you so much.


-
This filled me with peace, and softest essence of being at the beach. sigh. Nice.


1 - 6 of 6




