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Spin Cycle

I am in control.

                                                                       Here comes the sun
                                                                       Little darlin'
                                                                       Here comes the sun
                                                                       And I said
                                                                       It's all right
                                                                       It's all right

Don't remember the rest.
                                                                       Here comes the sun
                                                                       Little darlin'
Lost that record years ago.
                                                                       ...all right
                                                                       It's all right

Life or scratched vinyl?
Mine skips in stereo:
Me, myself, I,
                                                                       Little darlin'
John, Paul, George, Ringo.
Continuous loop.

Ancient newsprint lines the walls.
Lennon: {Yoko, solo, sober, shot}
McCartney: was not there to sing the song
Harrison: {wrote it, sang it, bought it (cancer)}
the drummer: {got by (help from friends), got subsequently lost}

                                                                       It's all right
                                                                       It's all right
                                                                                 right-handed thought
                                              scrawled illegibly
(left-handed hand)
in blunt-pencil graphite
on week-old grocery receipts,
affixed to obliging door with obliging plastic thumbtacks.
                                                                      
One can almost read
by the gloomy, sing-songy evidence that

                                                                       Here comes the sun

shines through the leather-upholstered keyhole
(one eye open)
just like a Jesus Christ night light.

I know what the peace-love-dope
hippy-fruitcake burnouts have to say about it:
    It's a rainbow sunshine world, friend.
    Let's all wear polyester hiking boots and sing kumbaya.

That's numbness for you.
Some folks
hurtthemselveshangthemselveshypnosisheroinheartattackhavesexhearvoicesholy
spirithulahoopshandgunshookershangglidehistorychannelhashishhitchhikehomicide.

Yeah, but they work too hard.
Nothing is much easier. Safer. Rot away in my
egg-shaped, safe deposit, home-sweet-hell garbage can,
munch on the decor:
melted ice cream, cardboard, coffee grounds, old socks, chicken bones, junk mail,

defective babies
                                                                       little darlin'
Go away.
                                                                       It's all right
I don't care what feels better.

But some cursed thing
always gives me a twist
—ready or not—
like every time before.

                                                                       It's all right

Wind the mechanism.
Throw the switch.

                                                                       I am in control.

We have liftoff.
A bullet-proof sunbeam turbotrain superbolt.
Yes, of course that makes sense.


Now cue the Beatles.

Author notes

If this sounded to you like a tribute to the Beatles.... Trust me, this is not a tribute to the Beatles.

My poems are never finished. Please say something useful.

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 19 of 19

  • Jesann gold member
    October 29

    Edit | Reply
    Very artistic and creative.
    Love the layout of your poem,... stirs the memories reading this.
    Interesting work, I enjoyed the read.


  • Night Hope gold member
    October 28

    Edit | Reply

    "Here comes the sun" is still one of the best tunes they ever did, in my humble opinion. I prefer their earlier work, usually. After "Sgt. Pepper's", they kinda lost me. Of course, I was far too young to indulge in whatever they were indulging in, sooo... But actually, I prefer Pink Floyd's "Comfortably Numb" over any of the rest mentioned herein. Go figure. I was too young to be a hippie anyway. I was 14 in '73. In my hometown in Kansas, the '60's didn't even arrive until the mid '70's. So, I was kind of on the outskirts of all of that, just in time for "Dark Side of the Moon" to kick into gear. And did it ever. I still have some vinyl left. Maybe 200 lps. Wish I still had the rest.

    Thanks for the memories, Morgan. Intentions of nostalgia or not, it was a trip. A strange one.


  • WitchyCatWoman gold member
    September 14

    Edit | Reply
    Very unique and artistic poem. I love this and the way your form is written. Good luck in any contest you have it in. Keep on penning for your work is excellent indeed.
    Hugs, Cat

  • I disagree with the comment below, I love the beatles, lucy in the sky with diamonds!
    Excellent write, I like pieces of poetry that ACTUALLY MEAN SOMETHING.

    Thank you for entering.
    Sophie


  • vaseline
    June 25
    Edit | Reply
    We have liftoff.
    A bullet-proof sunbeam turbotrain superbolt.
    Yes, of course that makes sense.
    my comments are never finished, therefor never usefull. but this made me laugh, i hate the beatles, i dont know why, i think its paul, he makes me wanna make a puke omelet, and his wife's fucking videos, especially the one with the fly, makes me wanna kill myself. but this poem, that i like.

  • That's numbness for you.
    Some folks
    hurtthemselveshangthemselveshypnosisheroinheartattackhavesexhearvoicesholy
    spirithulahoopshandgunshookershangglidehistorychannelhashishhitchhikehomicide.

    Yeah, but they work too hard.
    Nothing is much easier.

    i apologize for for having nothing useful to say. the above is my favorite part. bookmarked.

  • wellbegone
    November 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    I DID NOT READ THIS AS PUNK ROCK

    YOU are a highly intellectual soul. Poetry is your blesssing, ACCEPT IT, RECIEVE IT , BEHOLD YOUR GREATNESS!


  • Heart Sutra
    November 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I don't have anything useful to say. I just stopped by to read one of your poems. Interesting stuff you have going on in this piece...I am awful with line breaks because I live inside box poems. LOL.


  • Patpowers silver member
    November 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Interesting work in this one. I enjoyed your way with the expresssion and the visual movement conveyed. THANKS for sharing!!!


  • neurosine gold member
    August 11, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I wonder what the Beatles really might have had to say given creative and intellectual freedom. Most of them are deader than Jesus...but still...I think if the ones still alive unlearned some of what they know about producing music...and really wrote...what they could have created between then and now.
    They weren't punk rock. This poem is.

    • JustBe gold member
      August 11, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      Punk rock.

      From what I know of your disposition toward that particular music genre, it sounds like maybe you're saying you didn't much care for this one. In truth, I'm still not sure what to make of this poem. An explanation of what it meant to me when I wrote it accompanied the original post (which I later took down), but I posted it without the second time. I pretty much always write about personal experience, and this poem, for me, is purely self-analytical. I have been rather surprised to discover that it seems to mean something almost completely different to everyone who reads it in the absence of any hints from me. That doesn't mean this isn't really a "society" write that I didn't know I was writing, to be sure; writing is just like that sometimes, I think.
      I actually do like the Beatles, and this poem was never (consciously) my attempt at a potshot.

      Anyway, thanks for reading and commenting. You always seem to have something interesting to say. I wish I could remember how to write. Haven't been able to finish a poem in a year, and I miss it.

      Best,
      Morgan

      • neurosine gold member
        August 12, 2008
        Edit | Reply
        Nirvana is my favorite band...I know...I know...I'm a gen-x grunge fanatic...but that's all punk rock in an old sweater.
        If what you write is highly interpretable...that's sometimes more important than people getting what it meant to you and where it came from. I find the best poems out there could mean almost everything but they make parts of your psyche react and respond without explaining to you what you don't really need to know anyway.
        Here punk rock is a compliment. I'll slam anything anyone writes, no matter how much I admire them and would prefer they like me. The reason you don't know that is that your writing is consistently exceptional. If I don't think so I'm usually pretty clear about that. Not that I have many critiques, usually just observations and opinions...anyhow...rambling on now...take care man.

  • Going Forever
    July 16, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    this is very interresting...i liked it.....it says a lot about yourself...well written and nicely set out!!!

    very nice!

  • Amarige
    June 26, 2008
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    Very lovely and unique style..I like the way you set it up..wonderful job!
    Ruby


  • RawrSmileBabyPlz
    June 9, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Wow
    this is very interesting
    i like it


  • Pursed Poker Lips
    May 19, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    This is very unique and artistic, I love it.
    -BON*BON


  • Yemassee gold member
    May 6, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    You may not intended it as a tribute to the Beatles, but so much of them is caught up in those times, it's almost inescapable.

    The refrain, "It's all right" is more a manta, or a repetition hoping that it'll keep the speaker sane in some way. The poem seems to escalate downward as it progresses, from flippant humor to a more serious spiral, and that is when the reader sees what the refrain is truly about.

    It is both a mockery of the over-simplistic lyrics and the equally simplistic culture that spreads quick fixes through meaningless jargon.

    Or so I think.


  • rhondasail
    April 30, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I love this commentary on the wastefulness of our 'modern' society. We think we are in control of everything. We waste more than we can even begin to use or reuse...consumed by our compulsions ...but I did love the background music..."Little darlin', it's been a long, cold, lonely winter...Little darlin', it seems like years since it's been clear...Here comes the sun"...nice spin, that! LOL.....Peace, Rhonda

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