Matters old and new
crop up,
as my gaze finds a distant friend,
life throws open
so many doors
as I can feel
being touched by The Alimighty.
For moments
of true empty noise
are rare
and sacred.
Author notes
With 2 toddlers, I crave for a moment of silence sometimes.
In a list
A contest entry
- what happens in the white spaces by Dienush.
750 points, ended April 30, 2008, 24 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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I like this, and empathize with you. A true theme for our time! The only kink here,for me, is the phrase "empty noise"; it is a bit awkward. Otherwise this is seamless!
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Glad you enjoy my poem....hmmm..perhaps, I am not totally satisfied with that phrase myself....
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I relate to the want of this type of silence. The funny thing is, when the silence comes, you don't know what to do with yourself after ten minutes!
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I suppose so, I have so many things planned for that silence, but don't know if I will remember when that comes....
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I feel what you are saying. I sometimes crave the silence myself. My boys are 5 & 2 and I know exactly where your comming from. Best of luck in the contest.
Crystal
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Then we are in the same boat...may be when are toddlers are married off.... Hmmmm....
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This is pretty nice, I can feel what you're saying. The ending is a little too crammed with adjectives for me... I absolutely love the imagery though, especially the "empty noise". This is all so powerful. I don't think you need the "true" though... and if you could change the last lines to show instead of tell, that would be brilliant in my eyes (however some do say I have a sight problem so yeah). But this is a pretty poem. Thank you for entering.
~Diana -
A wonderful piece. Being mum of 3 I can so relate to this. Silent moments are few and far between, we treasure each one we get Superbly penned, good luck in the contest
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Then you know my point exactly...2 are driving me crazy..3 will perhaps just drive me crazier...
Thank you for your wishes
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crimsondew
Excellent write ear Good luck with it
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Thanks a lot.
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Great write
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Thank you..glad you see my point of view
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