J'ARRIVE
Je me suis conduit vers i have driven myself there
La ou le soleil est resplendissant where the sun is glorious
Une ampoule bientôt grillée a light bulb almost burned out
Le vent est en train de jouer the wind is playing
Aux cartes avec mes cheveux cards with my hair
Les branches dans ma tête the branches in my head
Se battent avec la réalité are fighting with reality
Remontent et puis redescendent going up and down
Comme un ascenseur like an elevator
Mes pensées comme un parasol my thoughts are like an umbrella
Pris par la pluie taken by the rain
Trempé, mouillé soaked and wet
Rempli comme un sceau d'eau filled up like a bucket
Mon âme agit comme un aspirateur my soul is like a vacuum
Envie d'une chose desiring but one thing
D'être moins vide, moins seul to be less empty, less alone
Les miettes ne sont pas suffisantes the crumbs are not sufficient
Pour les pigeons for the pigeons
Sur le trottoir de ma vie on the sidewalk of my life
Alors je me vide comme une bouteille so i empty myself like a bottle
Avec un trou sans fin with an unending hole
Dans les égouts de mon coeur in the sewers of my heart
Pourri et bientôt mort rotten and soon dead
À cause des mensonges des autres because of the lies of others
Mais l'espoir ne m’a pas abandonné but hope has not abandoned me
Fidèle comme les larmes faithful like tears
Quand je suis triste when i am sad
Comme un clou enfonce like a nail driven far in
Avec un marteau de métal with a metal hammer
Je réalise que je ne suis rien i realize that i am nothing
Paume, comme un enfant au marché lost, like a child at the market
Sans pile ou prise without batteries or plug
Tu m'attends depuis toujours you wait for me always
J'arrive i'm coming.
Miranda Lindquist
April 2008
20 yrs
Author notes
This is my second poem in French. Words just mean so much in that language, I feel like i can mean so much more and express myself so fully. I love France, the place where i was born and raised, the beauty of the language, the culture, the people, France has a very special place in my heart. And though i have translated this poem, i honestly didnt want to do that, as i feel it takes away every bit of the beauty of the poem.
A contest entry
- French Anything/With Translation-Please by 2lullabyhaven.
475 points, ended April 29, 2008, 14 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - prewrites by aeolia.
400 points, ended October 26, 2008, 130 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - (Trial & Error) en Francais (Pre-Writes allowed) by NothingButShrooms.
650 points, ended March 3, 6 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 15 of 15
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have you read, Bonjour Tristesse?
this reminded me of it. -
woua woua wouah!!!!
yes, this is what i'm talking about! ça se vois tout de suite que tu métrise la langue francaise, et les images... ah c'est beau... un vrai plaisir à lire, à dégustr... sans devoir m'arrêter a chaque mauvais accord ....
il y des endroits, où je pense que tu a oublié des accents, mais à part ça, magnifique
i love the pictures, the ideas... and you're right, at first when i read it, i was like wow, that's a bit harsh... but the words really do have more meaning in french....
thanks for entering !
(oh, et puis, petite question... t'as grandi où en France?)
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J'ai lu ce poème avec beaucoup de plaisir. Les images, les... oh je ne connais pas le mot juste en français... "similes" sont formidables. Mais j'ai tant de suggestions pour améliorer, si vous me permettrez. Par exemple:
"mes pensées... trempées, mouillées, remplies..."
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oh man the format of this hurt my eyes for reading; i don't speak any french [apart from introducing myself] and to be honest, ended up very confused - however for one who can speak french, i could see this working wonderfully for them
best wishes in the contest.
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I am glad you did or I would of miss a wonderful poem. I am sorry I do not speak French. I have always lived in the United States. This is how I travel in though other people words about their homes. I have had enough time understanding my own language. This poem touched my heart. Since I lost my husband in May and a brother in August of this year. I feel lonely. Thank you for sharing such a wonderful work with us.
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I thought this tite looked familiar. Congrats on winning a honorable mention. Good luck in getting lots of comments.
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Yay!
It was great to be able to dust off my A Level French and revel in the beauty of this language. Just to savour the pronunciation of the words was enough to get my taste buds flowing!
I was pleasantly surprised to get the major gist of this lovely piece without having to resort to the translation TOO much!
(But 'rusty' is a word that comes to mind...)
Well done ~ it was a pleasure to re-visit such a marvellous and rich tongue.
Bravo!
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The English version is very good, the French version must be exquisite! You write with such raw emotion and vivid imagery, the images flood the imagination with ample stimulation. Well done poet, thanks for sharing.
Dennis
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I too enjoyed the imagery (of the English version, I can't read French). In particular, the sewers of your heart was very powerful for me. Congrats on the HM
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My French is average, at best, but I preferred this in French. Often translations don't quite live up to the original ( Lorca is terrible in English! ). This felt detached - perhaps you meant that - in a good way, which fit what the speaker was actually saying. Kudos for that. And you have some good ideas and metaphors, but they fell kind of flat with the way this was rendered; you could have condensed a lot of this and rambled less. Ta for the entry!
-hiraeth -
Translating from one language to the other oft does not do justice to the original; some things are hard to change; some expressions are not literally able to be translated. Liked the English one though - thanks for sharing.
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I really love the imagery in this piece (the English version - French isn't really my thing) especially the wind playing cards with your hair and the child without a battery I thought that this poem would sounds beautiful and melodious in French (I got a friend to read the first four lines out loud - French is definitely her thing
) and although I'm sure much is lost in translation - I found it beautiful and congratulations on the honourable mention!
Keep writing
Polly
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Poems seem to be more beautiful in another language. The translations don't always pair up sometimes. Congrats on your honorable mention.
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well,am glad you translated
otherwise i would have no clue what to say,
it does look better in french, anyway
i am glad i read this, the form made it click
with what you were saying. Nice job.
...Simply Me♥
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Very goodlol thanks for your entry into my contestlol
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