The key to my life is mine, locked in me,
Knowledge is that which allows me to see.
Experience waits behind each closed door
And each one opened reveals so many more.
The truth in all is what I search and seek,,
To conquer ignorence, listen then speak.
I have found the path on which I belong,
said farewell to the many I know are wrong.
Pain is that which has taught me the most,
What has been given returns to the host.
Circles are many that hold fast the helpless,
All I know is that my journey is endless.
Those who are giving I accept and return,
Them that just take I will lose but learn.
A contest entry
- Key of your life? by princess hope.
450 points, ended April 15, 2008, 7 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Lovely Poem
Congratulations on winning the Silver in the contest. Your poem was lovely and heartfelt and deserving of being a winner. Thank you for sharing it with us. It was a pleasure to read.
take care,
Sandy
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Smooth flow indeed, and perfect rhyme. "Them who are giving I accept and return,
Those that just take I will lose but learn." This was my favourite line, It speaks more than truth; Words of true value. Thank you for entering, and best of luck!
Princess,
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A very powerful poem indeed. There is so much emotion and truth packed within these 17 lines. Everything flows so smooth throughout. Well done. Well done. Keep the ink flowing and good luck.
~Donna~
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my first
impression of this poem is that you layed this poem out with all of lifes important emotions and learned lessons.second i like the words you chose for writting this poem
and i agree with so much of this writing
you have hit the nail on the head
great work .
also your title choice is just right for this poem
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Well Written !
I really love this poem that you wrote. The way your words just flow so smoothly as if they were meant to be on paper.My favorite words are. The truth in all is what I search and speek,,To conquer ignorence I listen than speak.
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Some good rhymes here. In the fourth line of the first verse you might consider dropping the words "and" an "so" and see how it reads - "Each one opened, reveals many more". Remember to try and use less words whenever possible to achieve the desired meter and rhyme schemes.
regards,
- phattkat - -
Good stuff...my favorite part of the poem is when you mention that pain has taught you the most about life. I thought it was a little too rhymey and could have been said very effectively had you not sacrificed word choices in order to rhyme your couplets. But all in all it was very insightful and your view on life has really shown through.
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Wow, this was fantastic! I love how it flows both in the mind and, for me, out loud. I'd say my favorite part is this..
"The truth in all is what I search and seek,,
To conquer ignorence I listen then speak.
I have found the path on which I belong,
Compared to the many I know are wrong."
Good luck in the contest, you for sure deserve the win!
xx
V/E
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sonnet?
Hello there.
Thanks for sharing this awesome philosophical poem. I like the way your mind works.
I like the rhythm of this poem; it's pretty consistent except for this line, which is longer and has more beats than the others:
A door I have opened, my journey is endless.
Is this a sonnet? Itreads like one, although I'm not sure there is a turn in the concluding couplet.
Best wishes in the contest,
BJ.
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