Oh Guinevere,
how they leer
They scream and shout jeer after jeer.
Arthur is calm, the only one here
who seems not to care.
He doesn't even know you're there.
You loved him with all your heart,
but the knight Lancelot was the one you sought.
Oh Guinevere, you want to scream:
"Just burn me here!"
"Just let me out!"
"None should cry on my account."
Oh, but they do Guinevere,
They hide their tears behind their jeers.
A contest entry
- Inspiring Females (fictional and non-fictional) by Frodofan.
600 points, ended April 20, 2008, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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very good and interesting
I love the way you use good punctuation. I'm not very good at that but I still love to write. I can tell you have experience.
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leer*
Lancelot*
"He doesn't even know your there."
^In this line, "your" should be "you're."
"They their tears behind their tears."
^Is there something missing from this line?
Fix typos. Could have a more melodic rhythm, but it's not bad. I liked that line, "None should cry on my account" and the way it slant rhymed with "out."
Thanks for entering.
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Nice
I loved how you use the Authurian legend to write this awesome poem. Way to go, I love it. -
sorry for the typo the last line is supposed to be they
hide their tears behind their jeers.
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