The mountain cliff forbids the passing of the sea
It stands against the bitter waves and breaks the brewing potent storm
It waits with the silent resolution of the rock for the immanent assault
Of rolling waves, the jagged teeth of the sea which come to carve
The image of themselves upon the solemn stone visage of you
Lands steward
That protection you bear so well, your solid peaks rise above the waters
Which swirl around your feet, the strength of the sea broken before
The sprawling mountain roots, for now the sea withdraws, into calm waters
But we all know that life siege will resurface, the blue complacency does
Not hide the eager face of the eroding waters, which seek the earth
Yet you remain
The waters I know will draw thee down, eventually the outer rock will crumble
But that stands nigh irrelevant, for you have stood, and still stand
Against that sea, and the fear of its cold waters is loosened from me
Because of thee, and thy work, thy toil against the mountains bane
Though the water will breach and flood the citadel, in your rock you have
Built in your good life, an inner sanctum of the soul, abide there
For no waters may corrode its exterior, abide there yet awhile for that is
Where I will always see thee.
A contest entry
- March New Members contest by AP Greeters.
600 points, ended April 8, 2008, 64 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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This is a very wordy poem. Excellent word usage but for the subject matter, quite unnecessary. Its kind of like dressing up a child who is going to go out and play in the mud. More heartfelt words I think would have suited this poem better. But it is obvious that you are quite the wordsmith. Thank you for sharing and welcome to allpoetry. I encourage you to keep writing to read and comment. God Bless Tammy Site Greeter
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Welcome to Allpoetry
Oh this is just beautiful! What an amazing poem of metaphors! Love it! I also love the respect and love that cimes through in your words. Just gorgeous.
Thanks so much for your entry
Gaylene
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Welcome to AllPoetry
"the sea withdraws, into calm waters" -- the comma is unneeded here.
I must say I'm impressed with how solid and consistent your extended metaphor is, you have done a really good job on that. I'm not really fond of old English in modern poetry... Otherwise this is pretty good. Keep writing and good luck in the contest
~Diana
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Welcome to AllPoetry
You have penned such a metaphoric write for your Dad I am just overwhelmed by the feelings and respect you have for him
♥
Thank you for your entry
Best of luck
Stay safe
~Manda
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