Carefully sought upon a path to ruin
Dragging pain behind me
Holding hope at bay
This truth that was to find
This life that is nothing,
But a fevered hallucination.
Carefully scoped in life’s intricacy
Men tearing at my past
Taking this hope
From nerveless fingers
This dream that lasts forever
In a nightmare’s waking life.
A contest entry
- i'm the king of this pity party with my jewel encrusted crown by -foreverandever.
950 points, ended May 2, 2008, 33 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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ohh i like how you've used 'carefully' at the start of each stanza
emphasises the message of the poem, makes me think of delicacy and looking after something/someone fragile
'nerveless fingers' too is really interesting, conjures an unusual image
this is a really good piece, flows perfectly
thank you for entering
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