perhaps, her cellulite
was spider webs
for daddy's long legs
to weave through
with whispers,
once whispers were weighed
in ounces.
the same finger he used
to seal her lips
was the one he also used
to fill her up;
his lips walked down
her body -
then walked her
down the aisle.
the price she paid him,
orally
and in wombs with his name
for his secrecy,
for his guys' nights out
so she could have
girls' nights in:
dress her very best
and share dinner mints
so that she could be
a spider too,
her tongue leading the race
up fishnet legs.
and, perhaps, she was
arachnophobic
that she was simply
(and would never be
more than)
an itsy bitsy spider
caught
in her own web.
Author notes
1. Name [Real & User]: Christina [the sepia vitamin]
2. Age: 18
3. Amount of Poetic Experience: depends when (and if) one could say that what I was writing could be considered "poetic", haha
4. Typical/Strongest Style: free verse
5. Unusual/Weakest Style: didactic "poetry" o_O (*glares at Bel* :P)
6. Favourite Type of Inspiration: that really depends on the day & how my muse is feeling, haha
7. Amount of Multiround Experience: um *thinks* my first multi-rounder on here was summer 2005. and I don't feel like trying to remember the number I've done since, haha
8. Some Accomplishments: hmmmmmm. I KNOW! I actually wrote a poem today! HAHA
9. One Fact I Don’t Know About You: I had to think long & hard (nope, not that direction, Chase :P) about something you don't know about me that I could put on here. This one was a thought that occured to me in the shower. Ready? haha. I have a birthmark just above my left boob that I used to use to determine if a shirt I tried on showed too much cleavage... or rather, too much skin. hahaha. yes, seriously.
10. Additional Comments You’d Like Me To Read: I haven't decided yet whether or not to be nice to you yet in this. :P♥
A contest entry
- project poetry season one [prewrite & fresh auditions] by blackday.
600 points, ended March 27, 2008, 24 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - prewrites by Melissa Gayle.
450 points, ended April 25, 2008, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Small minor things, I would almost put stanzas one and two together - it seems more cohesive that way.
I didn't really like the whispers so close, but that is me being a repetition nazi.
Love the lips walking down body and aisle, really nice play on words there.
I love the spider theme here Christina, seriously. I know that I haven't been reading as much as I used to but I can fully say that your style has evolved and it is really great.
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I loved every word and line of this!
It was wonderful.
the same finger he used
to seal her lips
was the one he also used
to fill her up;
his lips walked down
her body -
then walked her
down the aisle.
Fantastic.
This should have gotten god m'dear!
*hugs*
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> The poem
x 100 > The ending.
How do you make your metaphors so perfect? I just don't understand !!!!!
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only bronze
This is so good the hairs on my back stood up (and I got lots of them unfortunately
)
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:]] your metaphor was done perfectly. you know, like you always do. I really liked your wordings though. They like, walked through the poem. They were so smooth & almost, seductive in their own right. I love it.
http://allpoetry.com/group/show/project%20poetry
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oh, and you do now owe me an information about you that I didn't know before. That's the deal.
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thank you!
I literally JUST sent you an email telling you I'd written something today for you, haha.
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