Problems at the Pub Pt 1

http://allpoetry.com/story/155786- Read that story for Raddon/Trey's point of view. The names in both stories have been changed to protect the innocent and guilty.


"Baby, look at me." - Kerran's eyes littered with what looked like mixed lust and tears. I couldn't understand him. Kerran was my boyfriend and most of the time, a really good boyfriend, but recently, he was just the biggest twat ever. Or maybe it was because I found pictures of 12/13 year old naked females on his computer and he's 20, so he has no excuse.

I couldn't look at him, I knew I couldn't. I was afraid of looking people directly in the eyes for some reason, I think it's due to James trying to get me to do that when we went out and when I wouldn't he'd grab hold of my neck and force me to look at him, I guess it kind of put me off doing it in future, but here was Kerran staring at me, begging me to look at him, so I did. The look was short enough, but caused me a terrible amount of trauma. I looked into those eyes that dared to say they loved me, that dared to explode the words that were uttered last night, 'don't leave Zoe, or I'll kill myself.'

"Baby I love you and we'll... We'll be happier soon," he said with a tone of voice that was so hard to muster the intention. All I knew was I wanted out, I didn't feel comfortable and I could feel another panic attack coming along.

Last night in bed - I was stupid, because I'd made love to him. I didn't know what else to do. I was drunk on way too much cider [the strong stuff too] and knocked back a whole pint for courage when I routed through his computer. Last time I came down to Kerran's house Rarron was there, he told me he'd heard rumours about this, but he didn't tell me soon enough. Somehow, I kind of hated him more for keeping it from me, letting me be in danger and letting me have to find out those pictures for myself. I hated what I saw, because... I didn't know whether it echoed part of me, because I slept with him afterwards. Was I ultimately telling him what he done was okay?

As the thoughts circulated round my head, I heard in the distance my phone ringing. Damnit, I bet it was Marlon phoning again, didn't he ever give it up? I mean he's a nice guy, but he knows I'm with my boyfriend and he knows how much he flips when other guys talk to me.

"Hi-" I spoke softly into the reciever, kind of shaky and quiet, unlike myself, most definately.

"Hi Stef, it's Tanya," I recognised her voice. Tanya was in the same flat as me and Natasha, a friend of mine. "Just phoning up to see if you were still coming to the party."

"Oh crap." I muttered, trying not to think about what was going on, but I wanted to go, most definately. I was afraid it wasn't for my friend, but moreover for a way to get away from Kerran, who I was immediately afraid of now and bitterly angry, though I kept it bottled up and certainly didn't act that way whilst he was serving our food up.

"Kerran, fancy going to the pub near College?"

"What for darling," he said, coming towards me and wrapping his arms around my waist the way he often did when he felt in an erotic mood. "Why not just... stay here."

"Stu and Jane are going." I muttered. He smiled, then turned me around and pulled me onto his lap, kissing my lips gently. I parted my lips slightly but nothing fundemental, I couldn't handle the attraction, I was so confused.

"Okay baby, we can be alone together later anyway, what time is it?"

"8.00 til... Well, 10.30 when David comes to pick the others up. I'll call Stu and ask if he wants to meet up with us at the bus station near there." It wasn't obvious, but I found Stu rather attractive. He had blonde, medium length hair [for a guy] and had a strong, masculine build, though he was as gentle as anything. His smile was one of his best qualities, which made the rest of the room smile too. He also had a nice voice and a really nice laugh. I didn't love Stu, but I certainly thought he was hot enough.

* * * *

"Alright Stu," I smiled at Stu, as I grabbed hold of his arm. I didn't care much today if Kerran guided Jane, who was losing her sight. Normally, I was rather a jealous girlfriend but now anger, fear and sadness overtook me and I felt free, almost euphoric, at being away from his immediate grasp.

I walked him into the pub and sat him down at a table. I was called over immediately by the girl whose party it was and Tanya, along with others who wanted to have an update on what I was doing and I didn't even realise til Kerran came up to me and handed me a pint of drink. He told me it was Beer, Cider and Blackcurrant juice. I smiled at him and thanked him.

A member of staff that I never really spoke to before was sitting next to me and asked me about Kerran and I and how we were geting along.

"He can still be aggressive, but never to me," I said, taking a mighty swig of my brew. "I guess he makes a special effort for me to be good to people. I love him lots though, which is what matters the most."

We chatted a little more and by no time, my drink was finished. I went up to the bar to order another one, certain I would get asked for ID and considering I was only 17 I was pretty buggared on that front. Kerran however popped out of nowhere and asked if I wanted another one, which I said yes to and he brought it over with me. I was glad he was buying for me, I usually refused but felt he owed me for the headache and tears he'd caused me recently. Besides, I was having fun. It was nice to loosen up a bit and chat to those you don't normally talk to.

By no time I was coming towards the end of my third pint and could feel the room moving a little. The girl whose party it was stayed but Tanya and some others went back, as David had told them to do so, as it was 9.30.

At this point however, I felt an overwhelming panic. I stood up, slightly dizzy and confused and walked past Kerran's table. Stu and Jane were there too. I sat down and had a conversation and felt the abruptness leave my lips not long afterwards.

"Nice to know you hate me Jane."

"I don't, I never said that... Zoe."

"Well, Kerran said you did." Kerran at this looked pained and then decided routing for me would be better and told Jane that she had indeed said that. I left the table with Stu's hands over his head and Kerran and Jane disagreeing with eachother. I hoped he'd clip her, to be honest with you, that's how the alcohol was telling me to feel.

I then slowly at first begun to walk out of the pub. I wasn't used of going around places on my own, due to my sight problems my mobility wasn't the best and so when I went into a full sprint across the car park, if I'd've been watching from afar I would've been impressed. However I was tipsy and in need of someone to talk to, so I rang up Rarron and the phone went dead the first time, so tried again. This time, the bastard answered.

"Zoe, what's... What's up?"

"Rarron, I'm really in trouble... I have a problem, Kerran he - oh, I don't even want to say it, it sounds worse when you say it."

"Okay then, wait a sec." He said. "What do you want me to do?"

"Come down here, we're at the local pub."

"My mobility skills are crap Zoe, you know that!"

"Get Marlon or Adam or anyone...To help you, just please, I need someone here, I can't do this on my own. I'm scared."

I could tell my fear got to him and immediately he begun to rustle about. I asked him what he was doing and he said he was getting his coat and was going to find Marlon and that he would be there within 15 minutes. We hung up on eachother and I just stood out there in the car park.

I looked at cars pulling in, the darkness swallowed me as I could hear noises from the pub that was only 100 feet away. I watched as rain begun to fell and I could imagine the rain as my heart, gradually bleeding all feeling, just being left with hollow hurt. The sky was dark now and pretty thunderous, kind of like my temper. I just stood there in silence, breathing heavily as all the realisations of not only last night, but of everything, came to me. Then I just had it.

A single tear fell down my shattered face.