Wednesday mourning,
unorthodox feel of a cold and exposed back
as opposed to the familiarity of warm embodied poetry,
completely molding specifically for my comfort.
Protuberant clouds and intrepid rains
extract my focus as if there was a climactic probability that pertains to me,
yet, cause is unknown.
Fortress of falsified tepidness shelters me,
compensating for one of the purest forms of appeasement known to woman.
Living in the literal shadow of this cluttered and bruised dejection.
A break in the clouds ahead
where a specific sunset fit for a tropical fantasy
unrealistically presents itself through my sullen, morose sky.
The blend of such incompatible situations create such a wondrous,
enlightened beauty onto a weak and pale moment my soul identified and shared.
I step outside,
feeling as though I am expected to unveil natures discoveries.
Me, barefoot and enchanting by the concealment of a lustrous amber satin
with a delicate blushing of natures brilliant crimson that awaits me.
Droplets begin to descend due to madness, caused by perplexity.
Every drop, swollen with glitterized hues
pertaining to rapturous love, lasciviousness, pleasure, beauteousness.
Here I dance in this glorified ambiance;
majestically seeping into my every pore,
fulfilling my sudden change of heart,
succeeding in radiating my skin to what once was and never thought could be again.
Why did I impulsively walk out unprepared?
Why do I keep dancing the same circles,
watching pessimism dissipate and become more obscure?
It is you, it is all of you..
The fairytale-like atmosphere intruding into my somber universe.
The dull, insisting rain;
now anew to impress and represent me
with the basics of glamour embedded.
Maybe you are so far away, but I see the sky that hovers you.
Your uncluttered,
picturesque paradise invading,
medicating,
and taking over mine.
A contest entry
- Pour out your emotions! by adema1214.
300 points, ended April 11, 2008, 13 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - *POETRY* ALL ENTRIES WELCOME! =] by only1love4ever.
673 points, ended March 30, 2008, 27 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I want your BEST prewrites!! by perfectsunset.
1000 points, ended April 24, 2008, 60 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Round 1: Enter Anything you want! by Sheilasbabygal4life.
400 points, ended October 23, 59 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - COMMENTS CONTEST V.3.0 by Bean Sidhe.
950 points, ended October 23, 49 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Dark Goddess, I am in love by hisfallenangel821.
700 points, ended October 28, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Can You Win More Than Once? by MJ Forgives.
1218 points, ended November 12, 224 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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I really loved your poem. It was sweet and it touched my heart. I really enjoyed reading this fine piece of writing. I hope you do well in my contest and thanks for entering. Love and Peace!
-Jess
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Initially speaking, the title drew me in. As a Beatles fan, I was intrigued immediately and you did not disappoint. The first line, the play on words with mourning versus morning is interesting. You have a gift with wording, specifically - there is an enormity of vocabulary that makes this poem a living, breathing entity. So, it's not a surprise that this has already granted you several trophies. I am excited to read more of your work...
In the meantime, thank you for your entry & best of luck in the contest.
- Bean Sidhe -
excellent
write you have penned
outstanding imagery and flow
like this stanza..
A break in the clouds ahead
where a specific sunset fit for a tropical fantasy
unrealistically presents itself through my sullen, morose sky.
ohh yea and this stanza..
Maybe you are so far away, but I see the sky that hovers you.
Your uncluttered,
picturesque paradise invading,
medicating,
and taking over mine.
good luck to you in the contest
thanks for the share
Darky
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Well written and flowed nicely. It brought a vivid image to my eyes. great job and good luck in the contest!
Liz
May the BOOMAGE be with you
<3
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This was a very well written piece you have here. I enjoyed the read. So keep up the good work. You can go too Round 2! Thanks for entering and best of luck too you in round 2 .
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Aw so beautifully well-wriiten.
Thanks for entering!
Love, Raneika
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writingjester
Love it all, especially the title. Huge Beatles fan!! -
This was a bit random but it was nice because it all revolved around the same sort of ideal. This made me smile and get lost in all the descriptive words.
Thanks for entering -
This is an interesting piece for my contest.
I kinda like it!
thanks for entering & good luck -
hi hi hi, I love this poem. I love the song Across the Universe by the Beatles to so this definantly caught my eye. I love all the imagery. it is great
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the title's in the lyrics from across the universe.
lovely piece! -
Wow what a powerful piece filled with bursting emotions, colour, and imagery. I really enjoyed the level of intelligence in this, with your expanding vocabulary. It all came together naturally.
Loved these lines
"I step outside,
feeling as though I am expected to unveil natures discoveries.
Me, barefoot and enchanting by the concealment of a lustrous amber satin
with a delicate blushing of natures brilliant crimson that awaits me."
Best of luck in my contest & thanks for entering
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Only1love4ever-Reply
Ahh this is unique and beautiful. You really took out your emotions and splattered them in this writing. I love it. It is a symbol of all that should be and what shouldnt be. Life has its funny ways of bringing us together. -
Beautiful...
I love it babes... It really is beautiful.
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