Those days I don’t thank you for not letting me die.
I just wanted to let go, from this hell be free.
Now it’s a struggle, a daily fight to get by.
You know my reasons, you say you understand.
How can you? How can you understand the black
inside me? I feel your hurt when I push away your hand,
each and every time my mind goes to a flashback.
I never know what each day will bring when I wake.
Will it be OK or will the memories sear through my mind.
Thanks to you I have no choice but to live with the heart ache,
What gives you the right to interfere? Do you think it kind?
Why did you stop me that night?
It could all be over now, no more battles to fight.
Author notes
It has only been a short while since I last had the desire to commit suicide, but the feeling of invasion when those who love me are fighting that desire are overwhelming. It doesn't feel like love as how can one be loved when one feels there is no one to care enough to make it worth living. It is a vicious circle.
Artwork JBurke
Follow on from
Do I want this kept confidential? By heck no, the more who learn about bi polar the better.
In a list
- Honourable Mentions (Green Trophies) • next in list
- Contest Entries • next in list
- Depression and Suicide • next in list
A contest entry
- Has your privacy been invaded by somebody(Contest) by dark tigress.
600 points, ended April 5, 2008, 11 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - BiPolar Poetry by Dangerousparable.
300 points, ended August 3, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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I undeerstand the invasion
You are the first to talk so frankly
good luck with the contest -
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Thank you, I have learned one thing its best to state things as they are than hide pretending life is good when its not. Those I love deserve the turth even when its bad.
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this is sad because I can not fully comprehend what it is like to deal with that on a daily basis but I am glad to know you have someone who is loving understanding and is there for you each & everyday. any ways a wonderful write from the powerful stan point of view that you are talking about awareness and what you going through on a daily basis. well penned though out cleared mind and any ways nice work and good luck with the contest.
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Thank you, its not easy, but the good days make it worthwhile.
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I see we belong to the same club... And it IS a viscious cycle, of which all the psychotropics in the world have failed to address... I don't feel klike I have loved ones as much as a small group who (so far) has put up with it... (and I stresss the , SO FAR!) Very emotional piece!


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I know Andy and Ju love me, I don't doubt that but then tomorrow comes and I am so alone in a crowded room it seems so far away.
Thank you for your words as always my friend you offer hope.
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Jems m'Lady my special one
this is a sad poem and i wish i cud take this illness and hurt away from you but i cant..all i can do is try and understand and be here for you when you want me to be and wait for you wen you want to be alone..smiles...
i love you Jems...this is a realy good write it hard to express youself like this...im so proud of you
xxx Your angel xxx

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Hugggs I love you baby just remember that on the crappy days
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i will ...smiles... xxxx
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good write
life and death situations like suicide is understandable. but i know how you feel with that you can trust me with that. i can really relate to this poem for i have wanted to kill myself as well and well am getting the help now a good write
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I'm lucky (some days I don't see it as lucky) I have a very understanding hubby. Part of my bipolar is massive suicidal tendencies and we are learning to live with that.
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