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The Men That Don't Belong

I too am a disciple of roving men.
Gathering in the forest of forgotten Gods.

Gathering in the mist of the hillsides,
where souls of lost congregations
try to remember what they believed,
and what they feared.

Those of them that have scattered to the fringe
are with me now.

We walk the night with our lanterns,
searching for fire.
We roam in silence,
waiting for love.
We speak of peace,
and try to protect ourselves from your ways.

I too am a descendant of the dire gypsy wolves.
They gather in the forest of forgotten Gods.
In congregations of howling bliss,
for the roving men.


 

Author notes

Dire wolfs singing for Bands of gypsies,
just a little fable .

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 81 of 81

  • Antebellum
    August 24

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    We walk the night with our lanterns,
    searching for fire.
    We roam in silence,
    waiting for love.
    We speak of peace,
    and try to protect ourselves from your ways.
    ..wow. this[like your other entries] are fantastic.
    brillant.
    not one for this sort of write, but this is great.


  • TwiztidMaggot
    August 21

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    This is a very good piece. I love how you wrote it. "We walk the night with our lanterns,
    searching for fire.
    We roam in silence,
    waiting for love.
    We speak of peace,
    and try to protect ourselves from your ways." those lines really stood out to me! I loved it! Keep up your great work!!! Congratso n the bronze trophy! And best of luck in the other contest!

    TwiztidMaggot


  • celestial
    August 21

    Edit | Reply
    Wow. I like the eerie feel to it created by the lanterns, congregation of souls, and wolves. It was in a tranquil way though. The title really captured my attention. When you wrote "Gathering in the forest of forgotten Gods", it really was a very intriguing verse. To constructively criticize, I noticed that you use the word "Gathering" and "congregation" twice. Perhaps, you could use another phrase or word in lieu of that. But overall, it's a good write.


  • perfectsunset gold member
    August 11

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    Well penned fable indeed!
    I have to admit, I am not one for
    fables & fairytales.. but you have
    given me reason to admire it with
    the stunning scenery composed here.

    This was a pleasure to read!

    Best of luck & thanks for entering

  • This is really good.. like you have a passion for the gypsy way of life.. the Romanys. I too share that passion my friend. I enjoyed this poem a lot - I think this is one of my favourites of yours. I feel your imagination.. its deep and sensual.


  • flaed
    April 12

    Edit | Reply
    kinda almost creepy. you didnt rally keep a set stanza length. you almost did. i think you should try to revise it to fit the 2 -4-2-4 thing you almost have going.
    but once again i like your work.
    do you fail at anything???

  • Interestingly

    haunting! Glad you won a trophy for this. You have a talent for these story poems that are very evocative & imaginative. Worthy of that trophy!


  • dewfall
    January 16
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    brilliant

    this one, out of all that i have read tonight, this one.


  • Sheli silver member
    November 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    i loved it, a dark fairy tale to draw me in... especially the last piece, very haunting and quite memorable, i read ALOT, but this one stands out like a much sought for jewel

    awesome job, Lowell

    PEACE


  • humblpye gold member
    November 4, 2008

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    Nice haunting an melancholic

    played out straight and true fellow wanderer...what whas it that we believed and then forgot...?
    and what was it we feared, and are the old folk tales and superstitions still embedded in our psyche somewhere...?

    A simple and honest tale told well brother
    Congrats
    John


  • movedon
    November 1, 2008

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    Congratulations on the bronze trophy. I love your story-telling abilties. They are so...well described, but not so much so that the reader feels overwhelmed. Great work!

    ing alone,
    Mylee


  • Peripatetic gold member
    October 26, 2008

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    Dire wolves and the ancient heritage of the gypsies, one extinct and the other in tattered, faded remnants. End times for humanity may be universally apocalyptic someday, but they come and go culturally and historically on a regular basis. Those born into or longing for the dead or dying "good old days" find their hopes and dreams for a lost way of life marginalized in the current era as you have so hauntingly, compellingly depicted in this darkly beautiful poem.


  • bobanonymous gold member
    October 25, 2008

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    Thanks for the entry

    Even though this doesn't have a smudge of irony and of course that's perfectly fine, the words are sparse and clear.


  • bobanonymous gold member
    October 10, 2008
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    Thanks for the entry

    I like the fantasy but ...


  • Mat Larkin
    September 28, 2008

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    Feckin-aye...

    Outstanding work!...Free verse so rarely captures me, nor do I often find it memorable. It just came to me that this reminds me of the poetry of Mr. Jim Morrison. No kidding... Good job...

    Mat


  • Patpowers silver member
    September 26, 2008
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    Great work again here Lowell! Nice effort on this poem! You did good as always!!!


  • Ms. Black Eyeliner
    September 18, 2008

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    "We walk the night with our lanterns,
    searching for fire.
    We roam in silence,
    waiting for love.
    We speak of peace,
    and try to protect ourselves from your ways." i love this line

    great job good luck in the contest


  • Master Anarchy
    August 22, 2008

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    Gip, See, Gams run free.

    An interestingly provocative title, for a start, wakes me up and starts my heart into reading attentively. I applaud.

    Truly, a good piece of poetry let down by a lack of just form.

    I would suggest, by way of example, a rewrite, but shall act with brevity by saying, for those with ears to hear, the last stanza howls the truth which the rest leaves a tad unforsooth. Again, I applaud.

    Knowing this one be not uncouth
    In the face of the forest flames that cool
    Not, knotted in the trees that be
    Springing hope eternally,

    Master Anarchy.


  • blackrosesteph
    August 10, 2008
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    Oh cool piece, I love the image you created in my mind


  • iamlost gold member
    August 6, 2008

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    Beautiful, I love the gypsy tone of this piece, telling the story of those who wander. A beautiful fable that deserves many a reread!
    Well penned.

    ~lost


  • Age of Rain
    July 31, 2008

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    Whoever you are, you are one talented poet. I really liked this piece, and your other one! Best of luck!


  • x Gemini x
    July 30, 2008

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    Thank you for entering my contest.

    It really is a unique write. And I like the detail, and a bit of history, that went into it. Interesting.

    Nicly done.


  • Blue Rew silver member
    July 24, 2008

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    Wonderful! Sounds like a fable I would love
    to learn more of. Distinctive tone here,
    very in touch with primal motives. Blue


  • Mozarts funeral gold member
    July 23, 2008

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    You have beautiful words dear poet. Thank you for entering this into the march towards individuality.


  • james119
    July 19, 2008

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    I take it the hero is anyone who has gone before in maintaining this traditional faith.

    An interesting write for sure


  • scarlet screams
    July 6, 2008
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    Oh, very mysterious and wonderful! Detailed, yet shadowed. Great job!


  • Seven Kinky
    July 6, 2008

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    Interesting. I've never read that fable, but I'll make it a point to look it up now. I'm sensing a trend in your writing. Not necessarily religious, but it's natural. You have a very distinct style. Loved that last stanza. Kudos!


  • Page Shut down
    June 29, 2008

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    Thank you for your entry

    I am not sure what this has to do with any of the contests options, it may have been more clear what you were trying for. A nice poem though. Sometimes we must wonder because those who push us outside of 'civilized' society are really the uncivilized ones.

    I encourage you to keep writing to read and comment.

    God Bless
    Tammy


  • z etoile
    June 28, 2008
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    Great job thank you for featuring this piece. Take care,
    MJ


  • LittleAnn
    June 27, 2008

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    First of all, sorry I didn't comment on this write earlier; and thank you for entering my contest and being so patient.

    This is a really interesting poem, one to ponder about for quite a quile...

    Thanks again!
    Keep on writing!
    Annie


  • BlackSwan
    June 19, 2008
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    Unique tale I enjoyed reading this

    -GL in contest


  • Wandering Woodchuck silver member
    June 18, 2008
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    Nicely spun tale.


  • ronnica
    June 14, 2008
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    Nice work, thank you for entering.


  • maralisa silver member
    June 13, 2008

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    We walk the night with our lanterns,
    searching for fire.
    We roam in silence,
    waiting for love.
    We speak of peace,
    and try to protect ourselves from your ways.

    I too am a descendant of the dire gypsy wolves.
    They gather in the forest of forgotten Gods.
    In congregations of howling bliss,
    for the roving men.
    a wonderful poem good luck in the contest


  • ea silver member
    June 13, 2008
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    good one!


  • Bean Sidhe silver member
    June 7, 2008

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    with over 50 comments here, you have to know what a work of art this is, yeah?

    But, I have to say my piece & add to the mix, if you will! I love the places your imagination takes you, and me by force of reading. I have yet to find something that you have penned that was not concise and explicit. Very little time and energy wasted. I love poetry for the quick effect - instant gratification and this was very satisfying. This collection of words in particular touches my weariness & calms it so well:

    "We roam in silence,
    waiting for love.
    We speak of peace,
    and try to protect ourselves from your ways."


  • Lady Gray
    June 6, 2008

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    I like it. It has a certain proud calm to it. And it seems in it's own style ancient and primative, at the same time. Nice job!

  • JWGoethe
    June 2, 2008

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    Intelligent and thought provoking write. Suggestive of so many things to me. Perfect phrasing. "roving men" brings to mind the ministry of Jesus, immediately contradicted by the reference to 'forgotten gods'--excellent. "trying to remember what they believed" seems to me to be insightful of our modern world. "We walk the night with our lanterns" reminds me that "Lucifer" is from a greek phrase that means 'he who bears the light before God'. Bravo on a work to be proud of.


  • Summer Dawn
    May 25, 2008
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    nice poem


  • SomeGirlYouKnew
    May 25, 2008

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    this is really otherworldly.
    i enjoyed reading it a lot.
    fabulous write.

    i get the most vivid pictures in my head while reading this.


    i just read it again.

    and again.
    mmm. poetry.

  • ecrivain01
    May 22, 2008
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    One thing only I have to say here:

    Magnifique.


  • Lotus-Mama
    May 17, 2008

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    I can't believe I have never commented on this, I love it, feels like I'm deep within the forest. Following fireflies and singing dreams.

    "Gathering in the mist of the hillsides,
    where souls of lost congregations
    try to remember what they believed,
    and what they feared."


    "We roam in silence,
    waiting for love.
    We speak of peace,"

    Pictures of perfection


  • apoeticinjustice gold member
    May 7, 2008

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    another good write, I particularly like the fringe line...conjures up some great imagery. Well written.
    Rory


  • KissMeGoodnight
    May 6, 2008

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    hmm yes. i like this verrrry much.
    i wrote a poem that gives me the same feeling as this. inspired last year in my world history class lol.
    well good job and good luck.


  • frownsnfreckles
    May 3, 2008

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    wonderful imagery here and such a powerful voice.

    We walk the night with our lanterns,
    searching for fire.
    We roam in silence,
    waiting for love.
    We speak of peace,
    and try to protect ourselves from your ways.

    This stanza is particularly effective, a wonderful little fable!


  • xRAYEx
    May 2, 2008

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    I LOVE THIS POEM!!!!!!
    And, yeah i entirely agree with you about the past.
    oh, and im shy too lmao
    RAYE


  • ButterflyforChrist
    May 2, 2008

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    Wow...

    This is really great. Captivating in it's own right... THere's something about it that speaks out...holds on to the reader. You have great talent, Lowell, another fantastic piece.


  • stylization
    April 30, 2008
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    wow it's a great poem!


  • Creatress silver member
    April 30, 2008

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    I know I have commented on this already, but I read it again and I am wowed again. this is a journey poem gypsy. lalala love it!
    "try to remember what they believed,
    and what they feared."
    brilliant. I am with you now.
    creatress


  • Mirrors shard
    April 29, 2008

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    wow...this was mysterious and captivating. i just couldnt stop reading it. in fact, i think this is the best poem i've read today (which is saying something). there was just something-im not quite sure how to describe it. just believe me when i say this was a terrific piece of writing!!!


  • Kp.s
    April 29, 2008

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    This was quite good. You definitely have a talent for telling a moving story in so few words. This line really stuck with me- something about it was just so powerful:

    Those of them that have scattered to the fringe
    are with me now.

    Brilliant write, great story- excellent work.
    All the best,
    KP


  • whispernthedark Greeters member
    April 26, 2008

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    Thank you for entering the contest, good luck.


    whisper


  • Mistress Masquerade
    April 20, 2008
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    wow. this was a pleasure to read, its a very well written fable with terrific imagery. kudos.


  • Pingwen
    April 20, 2008

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    I enjoy the nomadic wandering theme, of always having to look forward for safety and over your shoulder for protection. Good imagery.


  • TheNymph
    April 17, 2008

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    oh bloody hell this is incredible. i can feel it in my bones and blood.

    "I too am a descendant of the dire gypsy wolves", what a line. this is a powerful poem, you have captured something primal here, reforged ancient mystery for our times. i absolutely love this, the imagery, the language , everything.


  • TheDemonEve
    April 16, 2008

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    You've got a touch of Aesop in your veins, dearie. Maybe a little dark for Aesop, but you're good with fables nonetheless, and I must say, they are much more to my taste. I love the contradiction in these lines: "We walk the night with our lanterns,
    searching for fire.
    We roam in silence,
    waiting for love.
    We speak of peace,
    and try to protect ourselves from your ways."
    They add a certain element of coldness to the poem that fits it perfectly. Nicely done.


  • WindsAngel
    April 14, 2008

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    The imagery here was beautiful and painted a picture both sad and inspiring. Searching for something they may never find, but shows that they have the hope they some day will.
    Beautifully penned as per usual and like all of your other poems, leaves me with a sense that I've seen or learned something deep. I just need to stop thinking about it for a moment to know what it is.
    "I too am a descendant of the dire gypsy wolves."

    ~WindsAngel~


  • Cynthia Gaines gold member
    April 7, 2008

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    Great work...

    But, I'm not too sure I understand this one either... Please explain what it all means for me, I'm having difficulty making sense of the dark meanings.

  • stormchaser
    April 6, 2008

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    I am quite moved by what you label "just a little fable" because it leaves the taste of an epic in my mouth. I believe its due to the timelessness of roving men. I see warriors fallen and destined to roam. My favorite line was the first "I too am a disciple of roving men." because it makes me feel as though there are copious amounts of men who stand ass disciples as well. Well done!


  • Perception
    April 5, 2008

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    wow.... Once again... another brilliant write. Hmmm... I really like how this one is written.....

    wonderfully done...


  • Shancy Fayre
    April 1, 2008

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    I really stayed with this and felt the corpses of many dead armies throughout the ages. I love the second line. It puts you in the right place. I believe in the fifth stanza, the first line it should read wolves. Otherwise you left off the ending word. The wolf's what? Anyway, I read a lot deeper in this poem than a fable. Nice job


    • Lowell Poe
      April 1, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Yes ...you are correct...i have corrected that...
      thank you for taking time to read my work.
      I shall do the same.

      Many blessings,
      LOWELL POE

  • TheNymph
    April 1, 2008
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    this is so evocative and speaks of deep mystery and wisdom. i really like the line
    we speak of peace
    and try to protect ourselves from your ways.

    wonderful and well written poem


  • ArianaNeedsHelp
    April 1, 2008
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    Amazing.
    how long have you been writing?
    you write with the wisdom of a sage.
    Kudos!


  • urapns66
    April 1, 2008

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    This is really well written the only weak spot i noticed at all is right here:
    "and try to protect
    ourselves from your ways."
    that can all be one line i wouldn't worry about making one line longer than the other, in this case i think it just sounds better as a whole, the way i usually make my lines is by where i would put a comma, but really its up to you, this is still a really good write


  • Upstairs
    March 31, 2008

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    Wow, this poem is soo deep..it's amazing! Such beautiful choice of words, and great rhythm throughout. This poem really touched me..I feel like I can somehow relate to it.
    Great job, I loved it!


  • Ethereal One gold member
    March 31, 2008

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    I like your title, "disiple of roving men. Your poem has the feel of times long ago, when people lived at the destination they arrived at for the night.
    Very mystical write.

    Ethereal One


  • michaelynn
    March 30, 2008
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    This poem talks to me


  • Capt Jed silver member
    March 28, 2008

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    Nice write Lowell, Anyone and everyone who has wondered about their past could relate to this sometime during their lifetime. Don't you know that the lost generations you referred to were trying to figure out in their minds the very same thing about their lost generations. I loved the mystery and the enchantment of this work. Well done my friend.

  • Toons
    March 27, 2008

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    Wondeful. Passionate. Great metaphors, wonderful rhythm. great almost "repition" in the last stanza.

    "try to remember what they believed,
    and what they feared."

    wonderful line.

    great write =]]


  • Mirrors shard
    March 26, 2008
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    this is so interesting, sorta enchanting and mysterious nice rhythm i really enjoyed reading it


  • Random Goldfish gold member
    March 26, 2008

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    I'm speechless. The tone of this poem is pure magick.

    Síochán leat
    ~Mairéad~


  • S a r a h 4 5
    March 26, 2008

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    this was really good!
    usually when ppl use such emotion i cant follow along but i got most of this! good luck with the rest of ur writing =)


  • EternitysLastWish
    March 26, 2008

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    I'm really not very sure what triggered it, but whilst reading this poem I began to cry. There's something about it... that is so tragic... and yet so beautiful. I'm still choked up now. The fourth stanza was particularly emotional.

    Emotions aside, I have to comment that the entire piece was very atmospheric -
    "Gathering in the mist of the hillsides,
    where souls of lost congregations
    try to remember what they believed," what imagery!! And such a language that leaves the reader desparate to find out more, there is such mystery in these few lines that sets the tone for the rest of the poem. I honestly can't think of anything to change, Lowell, and it needs to be said that the last two lines leave such an impact upon the reader that it is quite literally, rather breathtaking.

    You've struck gold!

    God bless,
    your loving sister (from across the pond!) x


  • Whispering Wind Moderators member
    March 26, 2008

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    AWESOME

    you have spoken for all of our generation...we believe in the real, justic for all and life to beable to live as one sees fit.trying to protect ourselves from their ways...sighs to my brother...we are a dieing breed my love and the love for truth and justic with us~ we shall always be the band of gypsy wolves...hugs my brother...


  • DeadlyPoetic88
    March 26, 2008

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    Very well written.
    My favorite stanza was this one:
    I too am a descendant
    of the dire gypsy wolf's.
    They gather in the forest
    of forgotten Gods
    in congregations
    of howling bliss
    for the roving men.

    It was a great way to end the poem, and I thought that it was beautifully written.

    The word choice in the poem kind of made me think of a book I once read. It was just in the way you described things in this. It was a book about gypsies of all things... Kind of ironic that i would just finish a book that is so much like this poem. lol.

    Great job. I do enjoy reading your poems very much.

    Keep up the amazing job.

    -Dani

  • Nighttime angel
    March 26, 2008

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    I do love this poem so very much. your poems are beyond words at times. you have such a powerful gift for writing. the words come from your heart, none of them forced as I have seen with many other poets. I personally love the 2nd stanza and the also the 4th.. as I read this, the words just flow so nicely..

    outstanding job with this..

    kat


  • AlwaysbeBIG
    March 26, 2008

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    This made me smile. I liked it a lot.

    "Gathering in the forest
    of forgotten Gods."
    - Were strong lines for the beginning portion of the poem. For a first tercet, is was strong, and well articulated.

    This painted a very good picture of longing for me, of great comraderie. I believe that's what you were going for, and I think you did a great job.


    "We walk the night
    with our lanterns,
    searching for fire."
    - Were interesting lines. I liked them a lot.


    Sort of a fable about how through adversery trials were overcome, and the strength in the victory, is about what I pictured. Fantastic imagery.

    You are one of the best Poets that I've ever seen, who doesn't overdo their poems with all sorts of alliteration or big words, to acheive a great meaning. The poets who do that, make up for their lack of talent with too much effort, and it seems forced. These words seem to come from you effortlessly, that's what I love about your poetry.


    Blessings Brother,
    Brandon

  • Lotus-Mama
    March 26, 2008
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    UP way UP! You can feel the damp dark hillsides and see yourself trudging along with them. "Try to remember what they believed, and what they feared." You put this so well! Also loved the "howling bliss" Awesome write, Lowell!


  • nitefire
    March 25, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    For this being so new it is in no need of any last minuet fine tuning or editing.
    "I too am disciple of roving men.
    Gathering in the forest
    of forgotten Gods.

    Gathering in the mist of the hillsides,
    where souls of lost congregations
    try to remember what they believed,
    and what they feared."
    These lines paint a mysterious, eerie, and potent image on the canvas of my mind. I myself have felt like a transient in my life. Nomadic life can be exciting. I have often felt I was born much too late. This poem has reminded me of this thought.
    ~Leah

  • Creatress silver member
    March 25, 2008
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    this is fantastic. an extremely extra strong male! you done good on this one poe. the second stanza was my favorite, but its a close call. well done sweet spirit. May the Gods be with us, oh wait, we are Gods!
    always
    Creatress

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