Darkness' paws weigh down[on my chest]
children/demons claw at my mind
painless terror
colorless images
choke life's breath from me.
Eyes open to opaque void
dream's essence still contaminate senses
ghostly phantoms
return bodily senses
turning dream to dream.
Where is reality?
A contest entry
- can't sleep. by layla..
300 points, ended March 26, 2008, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Critique and give suggestions, please.
Comments
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you reminded me of Allan Poe. this is cleverly portrayed. good luck. and thanks for entering.
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ok, now that the contest is over, give your honest 'tough love' type of critique.
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oh i did... didn't know it was you jaan... i say whatever i feel like to anyone, so no worries i meant it
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