Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

Value



You admire shooting stars
Not for their brief but beautiful falls
or conflagration,
Instead
You mine their blackened husks
For semi-precious metals…


In a list

Where does it take you?

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments


  • BellaD
    August 5, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Love it. Succinct and powerful which I always admire. Very thought-provoking...could be the person is a true optimist making the best of a tragic situation OR a real gold-digger who doesn't appreciate something for its inherent beauty but only for what they can get out of it.
    Wonderful work.


  • acari27 gold member
    April 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    really nice fry-sorry, im using the word nice-its not an insult-this one calms me for some reason even though its pretty dark-wow its not overly aggressive it feels more a dignified condemnation, quiet 'ive got your number' observation- feels like a user, manipulative-dont know why it takes me to those words- just does-

    i like all of it, no word is wasted, or superfluous, i think its your use of brief but beautiful falls or conflagration (great word-feels like no other word would have fit there)

    and u mine their blackened husks for semiprecious metals--whoa-really impressed by this-so few words so much in it


    • ParadoxFry
      April 2, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      haha, yet again... bang on. I don't at all mind your use of the word 'nice'.

      It was intended as a dignified condemnation. You're description of 'user' is absolutely perfect. I'm always so delighted when I can get my message accross.

      Thank you again for such a meaningful comment, and taking the time to read my work.