You admire shooting stars
Not for their brief but beautiful falls
or conflagration,
Instead
You mine their blackened husks
For semi-precious metals…
In a list
Where does it take you?
Comments
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Love it. Succinct and powerful which I always admire. Very thought-provoking...could be the person is a true optimist making the best of a tragic situation OR a real gold-digger who doesn't appreciate something for its inherent beauty but only for what they can get out of it.
Wonderful work.
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really nice fry-sorry, im using the word nice-its not an insult-this one calms me for some reason even though its pretty dark-wow its not overly aggressive it feels more a dignified condemnation, quiet 'ive got your number' observation- feels like a user, manipulative-dont know why it takes me to those words- just does-
i like all of it, no word is wasted, or superfluous, i think its your use of brief but beautiful falls or conflagration (great word-feels like no other word would have fit there)
and u mine their blackened husks for semiprecious metals--whoa-really impressed by this-so few words so much in it
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haha, yet again... bang on. I don't at all mind your use of the word 'nice'.
It was intended as a dignified condemnation. You're description of 'user' is absolutely perfect. I'm always so delighted when I can get my message accross.
Thank you again for such a meaningful comment, and taking the time to read my work.
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