"Trapped in the chains" of obsession
the mind, a wolverine starved in the bed
of innocence circles feverishly searching
sniffing for the scent of its seemingly
lost origin.
Sucked in to the vacuum of specialness
churned in the vortex of "nothing's good enough,"
the foundering thought leaps and dashes hankering
for approval, the nebulous weight of love weighing
on the scales of Mercy, waiting in the shadows of
yesterday's tears.
Trapped in the bane of existence, in the abyss
of material nature, the gunas: goodness, passion
and ignorance seep through the cracks of idleness
penetrating deep beneath the surface of superficial
fortune; distractions loom like angry clouds waiting
for the opportune moment to outburst in lude and
laconic thrusts...
Sucked through the net of conditional life,
penalty points pound the skull of idiocy.
Moronic desires pommel the breast
of resistance seeking only for relief
in the absence of equinimity.
At His feet a true devotee finds the grace of
peaceful shelter
wrapped in the golden braids of Divine Omniscience.
A contest entry
- Trapped in the Chains by myaddiction19.
500 points, ended May 3, 2008, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
-
actually if u just refrased the first sentence of the 4th it could actually pull it together with out loosing you point in the verse
for example
"Pounded with penalty points to the skull of idiocy " -
-
myaddiction 19,
AT HIS FEET has been edited. Thank you for re-reading.
Best regards,
-
-
thanks for submitting a poem good luck in the contest.
i liked the poem but because you started the 1st and 3rd verse with the word "trapped" i would think it would of pulled the poem to gether more if you did the same with verses 2 and 4 likehave them both beginning with "sucked" or something. if you used "sucked" as the first line of the 4th verse because notice
Trapped
Sucked
Trapped
Penalty
see its like you made a good trend but then just threw in the word penalty
other then that i thought it was very good. -
this is a wonderful write i love the imagery weaved in your words good luck in the contest.
Adding your comment:
