Love Fever
(after "Sea Fever" by John Masefield)
I must feel and touch and caress you, launching my senses to the sky
All that I ask, love, is your love, and sweet smile and touch foreby.
Your honeyed hold and zephyrs kiss, my whole body shaking.
And a veiled sheen on my love's face, and the fleet dawn breaking.
I crave your perfumed touch my dove, sweep me now like some tearing tide
With a wild call, a passioned call, that will not be denied.
And all I ask are my senses, whirled, reaching high and flying
And the full breach, sweet connexion, you and I both crying
I must feel and touch and caress you, in our fragrant, loving life
In the right way and the one way, singing nerves like a whetted knife,
And all I ask is a happy face, from a laughing fellow-rover
And quiet sleep and our sweet dreams when the loving's over.
Author notes
This takes the last word of each line of Sea Fever by John Masefield to be used in a new poem in the same position and style as the original.
A contest entry
- Skin by Mari Goes.
700 points, ended April 9, 2008, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Very passionate poem!
You have warm and loving thoughts all through your verses.
Thanks for this lovely entry.
Mari
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Romantic imagery & moments in this poem - thanks so much for entering
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I liked the sea theme here and the rhyming compliments the sense of undulation and earthiness that I get from this poem. The meter was a little off here and there, but hey, I am no expert on rhyme or meter, lolol!!
You've painted some lovely visuals and I liked the soft romantic feel of this poem. Just check the spelling of "connection" in the last line of the 2nd stanza.
Nicely done - thank you for this entry.
~ Nicolette
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Thank you Nicolette for your perceptive comments on Love Fever - and, Ta Muchly for the happy clappers. On "connexions", I was bowing to our colonial cousins (Americans, that is) to stop them picking up "connection" as a mispelling. Should not have bothered LOL.
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I know Masefield wrote a lot about the sea, I remember a novel, ODTA (One Damned Thing After Another) lol. He had a sense of humor I guess.
"Foreby" in line two? Not familiar with that word. Maybe that is an English and not American word? Line three, do you mean zephyrs?
As far as the poem, it's the first in the contest, I think, that used a rhyme scheme, and I like rhyme so I enjoyed reading yours since it was a change from the others. Your poem has an earthy feel, not surprising understanding the influence, I liked that, gave it a different type of romantic edge, mingling the sea romance with a physical one.
And just like us men, when it's over, we want to sleep!
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And, I also see I can't spell outstanding!!! Thanks so much for commenting.
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Ouch zephrys has been changed, ignored word check didn't I? Foreby is in older Websters and means near or hard by. The word is of course the one that Masefield used. He also wrote children's fantasy around 1940 of which Box of Delights is probably the outstsanding item.
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