regret
moss covered pond
dulls her heart’s image left
on ripples chilled with early morn’
time distilled before her slowly flowing,
abruptness of his departure
reflected in sad eyes
as he left her,
regret
whisper
of jealousy,
twisted turnings unfold
her hidden desire now revealed,
folly’s fog hiding what she always knew,
never reaching forth towards love
but running from embrace
of ardor’s faint
whisper
shadow
beside her form,
incomplete without him
as their past melds in hope’s sunshine
of love’s revelation, finally found
within his arms that have waited
for her love in return,
her folly a
shadow
Author notes
triple rictameters
"I am going to take a heroine whom no-one but myself will much like."-Jane Austen
Ah, but we all like Emma, and adore Jane.
In a list
A contest entry
- In the Name of Jane Austen by Nicolette Everett.
1500 points, ended May 26, 2008, 10 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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There is something very pleasing in the concreteness of a triple rictameter. I think you have done great justice to the character. Congratulations on the bronze.
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I like how you used a triple rictameter for this poem. I'm still reading Emma myself, but I have seen it played out from beginning to end.
And I think you showed her very well in this poem. Just how Jane Austen showed her. So stuck in her own ways, then Emma finally makes it through them, and learns what was holding her back. Was also keeping her away from love.
The portrayal of Emma was nicely done.
Good job!
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Yes, we all love Emma, but admitedly, I would have been happy to smack her across the back of the head once or twice. But it had a happy ending, like all good novels should. Beautiful poem and I love the way you have made it appear so beautiful on the page as well.
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Excellent.
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Very well done! Your form is flawless and your words are captivating. You have described this heroin in wonderous beauty. Best of luck in the contest!
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Just beautiful, you give us Emma and you give us Jane all woven seamlessly in form. Love, C
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