A slit to the wrist,
A pierce through the heart,
Stinging tears bleeding from my eyes,
All this pain I feel because of you,
I don't need to bleed,
I don't need to grieve,
That's what you need,
Then tell me how it feels,
I bet you'd explain it like a shot in the back,
Yea, I bet your world is beginning to crack,
Just like my heart cracked in two fragile pieces,
You've left me alone to glue them back to one piece,
Make it a whole heart again,
But without you there it will never be whole,
Half of my heart will always belong to you,
I guess it's time to get out my needle and thread,
You ask me why,
And I just reply,
A needle going through is less painful than you not being here,
A contest entry
- What Do You Want? by violetrose.
630 points, ended May 15, 2008, 37 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Enter All Your Personal Writes Here (Part IV) by xxRainbowDawnxx.
900 points, ended May 24, 2008, 208 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Dark Thoughts That Ravage The Mind... Picture Prompt by Rogue-Poet.
1800 points, ended July 12, 2008, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What is your first impression?
Comments
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Intensely wonderful. I like it best of luck in the contest.
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This is a strong piece very full of emotion. I really like the idea of "time to get out my needle and thread," because it's one of those images we all have at some point in time; when something's broken, we want to fix it. My only criticism with this piece is your use of commas at the end of every line...at least for me, it gives the whole piece this rushed feeling, like each line is supposed to be leading to some sort of conclusion or a period or something. But other than that, I really like this piece and I can tell you put a lot of thought into it. Great job!
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This one is my favorite...you actually sound a bit like me in this one...and it doesnt make me feel strange cause someone else finally used words like i do!!!
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