Millions of eyes seek their prize
Is that saying true?
It’s all in the eyes
Heat then, is not the only thing that melts
Her voice disarms
Her charm massages
Her tiny fingers linger in my mind
This undeserving heart wonders
Do the eyes have it?
Piercing me
I’m on the ledge of gratitude
Flash flooding buckles these knees
I knew it for a while
There was buried treasure protected in the darkness
Those sounds of thuds and thumps
And fluttering waves jarred the surface
With instruments of precision
With determination
Bewilderment, beckoned my way
Fantastically, 3 seasons peeled away their contributions
These two ungrateful eyes couldn’t fathom
The limits of a mind’s vocabulary was reached
Suffering under the weight of cluelessness
How does she do it?
(As if her eyes weren’t enough)
Then she smiles…
And 5 years later I have no defense against it
It’s not the jewels in the earth that are precious
It’s the ones from our mothers…
Comments
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That last verse is powerful indeed!
"it is not the jewels on earth that are most precious..it is
the beauty of our mothers eyes lovingly revealed."
inspiring..thankyou for sharing this beautiful poem
with us!
ears/Seattle
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Wow...(and if I didn't know any better, I'd think you were on a 'wow'ing' spree...hahaha). This is a very touching comment! I didn't add any author notes but it's about my 5 year old daughther. She disarms me without any weapons. Just the power of her love. "Humbled again...". Thank you very, very much for this great feedback.
AsIThink...
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"I’m on the ledge of gratitude
Flash flooding buckles these knees"
I am not a parent nor do I have brothers or sisters but the eyes of the children of my friends create these emotions in me.
Great work! I like your screen name.
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Thank you very much for the warmth and kindness in your words. I really appreciate you taking your time out to read these words here. Wow, thanks (I think you're the first...to like comment on my screen name I mean - lol).
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Exquiste poem. You write with a feather pen tickling unseen thoughts onto the page. I loved this...alby
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Now, that's quite poetic...very nice comments here. Thank you very much. (But most times, I use the key pad...lol). So glad this had that effect on you...wow.
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This is perfect. The impossible can be accomplished through our children. You have strung together a collection of words to create a work of art.
Beautiful.
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Thank you so much. This is a beautiful comment. Simply wonderful. Yeah, what grace was given to us with them is hard to define. Even hard times can be lightened when a child(ren) tells you how much he or she loves you; how great (they think) you are...wow. Thank you again for taking the time out of your life to read something I've written.
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It was my pleasure really. You came very highly recommended! *s*
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Me? Hmmmmm? I think I could probably guess...lol.
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That is one very lucky little girl this was written so beautifully..simply amazing from beginning to end
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I don't know who's luckier I guess. I think it's me; she thinks it's her. But she'll sometimes say, "Daddy, aren't we so lucky to have each other?" Hmmmm...what can I say to that (other than, "yeah, yeah we sure are"). Thanks so much for your warmth and kindness. Thank you for this read.
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YOUR WORDS SEEM TO CAPTURE THE PURE ESSENCE OF LOVE SO PERFECTLY GIFTED YOU ARE MY FRIEND GOD BLESS...
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Thanks to your gifted eyes and ears, this piece has seen the light of another day. You make this piece more meaningful by your review of it and enjoyment too. I honestly appreciate the visit here and hope you come more often. I will be by to visit your pages after this comment (God-willing).
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Wonderfully done, poet. Very capitvating write. Not at all what I expected. A very pleasant surprise. Thanks for sharing. Write on. One.
Dez
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Bro., thanks for your inspiring feedback. There is much more I'm sure is left unsaid about a parents love for their child(ren). Let alone a father's love for his daughter (lol). She's in me and I'm in her...your kind words mean a lot to me. Thanks again.
---AsIThink...
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Loved this....
really captures us from the beginning to the end,
and the last line made us all sigh...and run to call
our mom's! loved it! deep is your soul, fearless
and bold too!
ears/granny in Seattle.
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Stupefied is the word I formerly lost. Pure silk on the brain, smooth like a cherry icee in the summer, or a hot cappuccino in the winter... The lyrical quality of your work, blows me completely away! Amazing flow and rhyme and always some kind of story or message being put forth. Entertainment at its finest..
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lol...girl, you are so funny (in a good way). Who paid hired you (to say all this great stuff...?) lol. Where have you been all my (so short) AP life? lol... This is a definately a poetic-adrenaline boost if I ever had one. You're making it hard for me to keep my straight ('stone') face. I am very, very grateful for your incredibly wonderful comments. (Too good to be true...?)...lol.
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Good work should be shared and in turn praised for what it is. Now I only know that I love it.. And it is really hard to buy my opinion.. Im pretty honest and blunt in nature.. I speak pretty much what is on my mind.. I guess you could say my filter is broken.. So no one paid me, and I love your work with all honesty. Please keep the muse alive and dancing!
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lol...don't take these f/u's to seriously. I'm also an honest person (according to me and I think everyone I know). So my responses are light-hearted. I have no reason to doubt what you are saying. "my filter is broken"...now, that's hilarious (lol). Good descriptives you use. I joke a lot. Maybe more than I should. But I don't mean any harm. This is piece is about my daughter. If people pass it by or not, it's still how I feel about her. I love her too strongly to be bothered by neg. if they did show up. But your's are so positive and strong: wow. Thanks again and again.
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You are then the lucky one, yes the eyes say it every time.
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lol...they sure do. And I sure am. Thank you very much for the feedback.
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An easily relateable poem, Having Six Daughters I know this power very well, I melted long ago and am now an endless stream of: "Sure Sweetpea, anything you want"
nice write. I likes it.
. Rewarded 4
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Thanks so much for this thoughtful comment. Who knows about it, knows about it...who doesn't - doesn't. But, who doesn't? lol...
Sure Sweetpea, anything you want"...lol. Wow, now I sure do know that one.
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Very sweet and heartfelt bro. my kids have some of the same affects on me. you gotta love them. Great job!
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Hey, what can we say, huh? And love them we do. And melt us, they do...lol Thanks a lot for your feedback. I wish you many, many smiles and laughther with yours.
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Thanks for the read and the applause.
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This is absolutely beautiful!!! It's full of powerful images and moves along very nicely!
What a lucky little girl! -
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I'm moved by this comment of yours. I'm lucky that you took the time to read this. I think that I'm more lucky to have her than the other way around. This girl reminds me of an "emotional M&M" (she melts my heart when she's in my hands). Thank you very much for your feedback.
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sweet
sweet write on love . . liked "Millions of eyes seek their prize" and "It's the ones from our mothers ..." good first and last lines . .
. Rewarded 4
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Thank you. I appreciate your comments here. Glad you took the time to read this - happy that you felt that way.
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Loved this for a number of reasons. I related to it on a personal level, an emotional level and it just flowed like water over the edge of a waterfall! Beautifully penned!
. Rewarded 4
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I'm laughing (again)...this is a wonderfully, thoughtful comment. Plus, it's very...well - VERY poetic. lol. Nice touch (in response form). Nice form (lol). Thanks a lot for reading this piece.
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Wow, that was a captivating piece. I really enjoyed it. The lines "I knew it for a while
There was buried treasure protected in the darkness
Those sounds of thuds and thumps
And fluttering waves jarred the surface" speak to me in such a way. Good write, Dear poet..Thanks for sharing it.
. Rewarded 6
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Thank you (a great deal). I love this little girl (my daughter) so, so much. I reflected over how she tugs at my soul and then the words just came to my mind (from my heart). Your welcome (and thanks for reading it).
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I liked the part about having no defense against their smiles! How true is that. Great write
~Miley -
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(laughing...) This is funny. When they've got you, they've got you... Thanks so much for this reply.
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so much love, hmm, wow, she got you huh. I did that too. -eleno
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lol...yeah, she sure did. Love her from way deep down... That's for comment.
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PURE BEAUTY
and love, in these words. This an outstanding dedication to one who obviously has you wrapped around her finger! yet, I know the feeling well!
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Yeah, you called it...I was wrapped the 1st day I was trapped: her birth date. I love this little lady. Thanks for the comments (and I know you know where I'm coming from here...).
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