Fly my tiny bluebird and sail upon the wing
I will fly beside you, so I can hear you sing
Songs so full of laughter that fill the void of love
Capturing my spirit, whilst hovering above.
Dance bright, golden moonbeam and cast your spell tonight
Casting your florescence upon us in our flight
We will twirl together as feathers float away
To carry our true spirits across the Milky Way
Wait for me, my lover and I will hypnotise
We will be together as stardrops kiss your eyes
The bird of life is waiting to lift us to the moon
This chariot of fire, is coming for you soon.
A contest entry
- Rhyming Rumble 1 ( part one of a 3 part series ) by RuthKephart.
525 points, ended April 5, 2008, 21 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Just back for another look
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How utterly delightful and completely enchanting. This is a piece where love simply shines within your rhyme. I did enjoy this very much. Left me with such a good feeling and after all, that's what its all about when you read verse. Well done. Very well done. Best of luck in this contest. ~Pamela
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Yes, that line works so much better now
Ruth -
Excellent
This is one of the best pieces of poetry I have read in a while. Your rhyming is ACE! I love the words you have penned here, they flow beautifully, nothing is forced, well done and best wishes for the contest.
Katie
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Beautiful use of rhyme here and a loving poem for sure. The meter was smooth except for one line:
Carrying the spirit of those who find the way
You may want to experiment with this line a bit. Also did you mean 'florescence'. I always come back for rereads at least once before judging. Thank you for your entry and best wishes in the contest
Ruth
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Thankyou for you advice.I have played, Ros
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SO SWEET!!!
This sounds like a lovely love song for that special someone in your life.
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Beautiful. I keep writing about flying at the moment, I'm glad I'm not the only one.
Your rhyme and flow are as great as ever.
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Excellent
This is excellent I find the flow perfect and the poem enchanting. a really enjoyable read from the writers pen one to be proud of. all the best (Brian)
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