History Revisited

There are things in life I dont understand
Which still remain a mystery
Like names of infamous people
Purposefully forgotten throughout history

When Columbus went on his tour of the East
Who turned around the map?
And who should have been on the bridge of the Titanic
When the lookout went for a crap?

Who told the Light Brigade to charge?
And who forgot to mention Visa?
Which council surveyor passed the foundation work
For the Leaning Tower of Pisa?

Who sent the party invites
For General Custers Last Stand?
They sent one to the wrong Sue
And forgot to book the band!

Who forgot to feed the electric
So Florence had to use a lamp?
And who knocked down the Walls of Jericho
Cos they thought that they had damp?

When Alexander Graham Bell first used the phone
Who was on the crossed line?
And who was serving tables at the Last Supper
And got Judas pissed on wine?

Who set the microwave on full power
So that Alfred burnt the cakes?
At the feeding of the five thousand
Who ordered well done steaks?

When told to meet your maker
Who cried off cos they were sick
When God parted the Red Sea for Moses
Who shouted "I know how you do that trick"?

So when you read your history books
Dont think you have seen the lot
Because by far the most interesting
Are the ones that have been forgot