~ Sandstorm enveloped hourglass ~
tiny particles sting flesh,
reminding immaturity
was discarded
~ ruler of Earth ~
wisened ancient redwood
has remnants of rainfall ,
dripping knowledge earthbound
from omniscient branches;
genuine rainbows apologize
for previous grey falsehoods,
exposing unfettered paths
for shuffling feet.
Author notes
40 words
Prompt:
'You're growing up. And rain sort of remains on the branches of a tree that will someday rule the Earth. And it's good that there is rain. It clears the month of your sorry rainbow expressions, and it clears the streets of the silent armies... so we can dance.'
-Jim Carroll-
A contest entry
- Quote Inspired. [40 words or Less] [III] by Naridill.
400 points, ended March 26, 2008, 5 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
-
an unusual trilogy of three different poems into one. Yet each uniquely relates to the other that as we grow we discover the illusion of life is merely our own making
Joe
-
Oh My Word!!
Now this certainly gives the reader sustenance to swallow
These lines grab~~
~ ruler of Earth ~
wisened ancient redwood
has remnants of rainfall ,
dripping knowledge earthbound
from omniscient branches;
Love the words: ancient redwood...
the images left an imprint
Thank You for sharing Your Talent and Spirit~
Many blessings to You in the contest Sweet Soul
Best wishes too
and much love~ Desire~*~
-
This has such a unique quality about it. You take so much from the prompt, and weave something all your own. The poem leaves a remnant of pure hope, tettering along the edge of seasons. Thought provoking, and truly poignant. Great imagery throughout! Best wishes in the contest!
-
I really love this, your expression throughout is brilliant, Josie
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