The warm water first hit my skin--
A feeling so enveloping
I had to make it hotter.
Still crying over my loss--
I twist the knob more--
Hotter and hotter it gets
Nearly scalding my flesh...
The pain intensifies.
More...
I stand in the shower
Embarrassed at what I've done
Why did I let down my guard?
The water continues to sting.
I let out a scream
Intertwined with sobs
Why did this happen?
It's all my fault.
Scratching the scabs
I watch myself bleed...
My skin is so pink
The scratch marks have let their place
Pinkish red lines all over.
It's all my fault.
Author notes
I can't go into it right now...
Written December 4th, 2003
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Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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wow!
wowthis was brilliant! you might want to change the font though...it was a bit hard to read...i love Jack off Jill
haha yeah well on a more emotional note this was really really well written and touching and sad. i hope you feel better!
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Brilllllant!xx
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You really show your pain through this write, I really do hope that you are OK. Mending a broken heart takes time and lots of ice cream,
, but don't worry, you will get there and wil be able to move on, but only when you are ready, and in your own time.
Blue
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Ouch. On a physical level, this makes me think that a person is deranged if they go and scald themselves willingly. I don't like hot water that much. But on a deeper, emotional level, I can see that the water is a sense of heartache, and a person who hasn't extricated themselves from an abusive relationship may also seem to want more of that treatment because they mistake it for love and that's all they are used to. I used to be a person like that, but never again... and plus even though I can't maintain a stable relationship, I will much rather wait for someone who will appreciate me for me and for all time than to be with just anyone who will treat me any kind of way.
Thanks for giving me the time to rant...
Many blessings,
Raven Aurora
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Intense and really raw in the depths of the pain within the imagery. I struggle with this content, I do understand about pain and thinking about hurting oneself, but I had someone who cared tell me after I admitted it to him that I was thinking about allowing myself to fall down stairs to break bone...he told me that if I ever did it..he would hurt me bad. I never thought those thoughts again..not out of fear but because I finally found someone who gave a damn enough to care if I did it and someone who would be really angry enough to make me pay for it. I've never forgotten that person. I cherish him because he saved me from this hell. I hope you understand what I'm getting at, hun.
Daoine -
Hey girl! This is really powerful and gorgeous, and I'm sorry that I haven't been on much...I'm sooo freaking busy! Anywhozzles, I've got an idea in the works, so that'll be out soon...keep them coming!
Erica -
I love that song. It's by Jack Off Jill.
!~YS4e~!
Scarlett -
Been listening to that ""Strawberry gashes,"" song again, by er.. is it Jack off Jill, or Less than Jake??
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