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The Lake of Dreams

Missing image

The Lake of Dreams

The waters of our dreams sublime
Within the mountains of the mind
Unscathed, the Sentinels of Time
With mortal loving hope refined

Within the mountains of the mind
I saw the watchers of the lake
With mortal loving hope refined
To drink it’s waters and partake

I saw the watchers of the lake
The quest of every mortal soul
To drink it’s waters and partake
Fulfilling dreams that will extol

The quest of every mortal soul
Unscathed, the Sentinels of Time
To drink its waters and partake
The waters of our dreams sublime

 

 

 

Author notes

Art work:
Title: The Sentinel
Artist: Bill Corbett


Pantoum Poetry:
The pantoum consists of a series of quatrains rhyming ABAB in which the second and fourth lines of a quatrain recur as the first and third lines in the succeeding quatrain; each quatrain introduces a new second rhyme as BCBC, CDCD. The first line of the series recurs as the last line of the closing quatrain, and third line of the poem recurs as the second line of the closing quatrain, rhyming ZAZA.

The design is simple:

Line 1
Line 2
Line 3
Line 4

Line 5 (repeat of line 2)
Line 6
Line 7 (repeat of line 4) Line 8

Continue with as many stanzas as you wish, but the ending stanza then repeats the second and fourth lines of the previous stanza (as its first and third lines), and also repeats the third line of the first stanza, as its second line, and the first line of the first stanza as its fourth. So the first line of the poem is also the last.

Last stanza:
Line 2 of previous stanza
Line 3 of first stanza
Line 4 of previous stanza
Line 1 of first stanza

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 25 of 25

  • Whispering Wind Moderators member
    April 15, 2008

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    Just as beautiful as  the first time I read it...niaish so much for entering


  • Elfin
    April 14, 2008

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    Hi Amera, this as got to be one of my most favourite forms along with the Villanelle, and it sits well with this poem. It is a beautiful picture and your words do it justice. I love it, there is not one word that I would change. Well done and good luck in the contest. Val


  • Ithica silver member
    April 4, 2008
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    Another beauty... You are untouchable!!! Love this Pantoum, and the lovely message within!!!


  • Swan song gold member
    March 29, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Your words are as lovely as the picture they paint.
    Your form is perfection dear!


  • And Hyetal
    March 22, 2008

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    This is a very interesting form! I would really like to try this sometime!

    You've blown me away with your story-telling, again.

    Good luck in the contest!

    ~Cassie


  • StarEyes
    March 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Once again, you have amazed me with your words!! This is amazing. I love the rhyme, and this line,

    "To drink its waters and partake
    The waters of our dreams sublime"

    I love that. just kinda jumped out at me.

    Best of luck in this contest!!

    and love

    Nyetta


  • HaleyMary
    March 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful write, Sis. Wonderful rhyme. I really liked the third stanza, especially the parts of the mortal soul and the waters. It made me think of life and of how without water nothing would be able to live in in the world. I think water should be the thing that makes the world go round, as without water there would be no life at all. Thanks for sharing and keep that pen flowing.


  • moonbumps silver member
    March 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Been at your ABAB's again!!!
    Brilliant from start to finish!!
    xxx Hilly

  • Whispering Wind Moderators member
    March 21, 2008
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    My beautiful little form Queen you have stolen my heart again with your wonderful words:f...the flow is like magic and leaves a little soft whisper behind...sighs...winner for sure Little Blue Star*star*

     

    Nemehotatse always...

     

    *hug* mom *hug*


  • malmadre gold member
    March 21, 2008

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    This is a woven tapestry, and the lines blend together so well and carry through to the end. A beautiful tribute to the picture!


  • PerVirtuous
    March 21, 2008

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    This poem is a tapestry of image and form. Fantastic. You have captured the unconscious, but, I think, a collective unconscious. This is a difficult form to master, and you have penned this flawlessly.


  • Poetry-and-rhyme
    March 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    sisss i miss your writes i miss it a lot ur just amazing sonnets pantoums villanelles u name it u rockkk good lucks sis


  • cricketjeff gold member
    March 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    At times in the past some of your repeated lines did not quite sit perfectly in the poetry. Not a hint of that here, each stanza works perfectly on its own, as it should if the pantoum is also going to be a great poem.
    And this is a great poem.


  • BellaD
    March 21, 2008

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    Lovely poem!

    A beautifully penned poem that, itself, flows like a dream. Soft quality to the words. Well done.


  • RedAquarius
    March 21, 2008

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    This fits the picture perfectly (and vice versa!) - I really love the snippet "sentinels of time" - I get a great picture in my head with that! Awesome, as always!


    • Amera gold member
      March 21, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      I so am thrilled to see your signature on one of my poems again. I really missed you when you were gone.


  • Poetic-Theorem gold member
    March 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Bravo!

    Briiliant take on the prompt!
    Love the Pantoum and you have used this form to bring the image to life. Rhyme and flow is flawless.
    Powerful usage of vocabulary as well
    LOVE IT!
    Wish you the best in the contest.

    Much love
    Many blessings

    David


  • myrataal silver member
    March 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Lovely work, Amera ...

    we are woven into a wondrous web of linkedness. And to partake in the shared Dream, to actually "drink" from its fountain of Hope, is a privilege and a blessing.

    The repetition of this pantoum, as with all repetitive work, reinforced the message.

    Typo: it's = its (it's is it is, if you can figure that out LOL)

    Love
    Myra


  • pantress silver member
    March 21, 2008

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    You are the master of all difficult forms. Always making it look so easy, as you whip out the perfect poem time and time again. Jennifer


  • Cup-a-Joe
    March 21, 2008
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    What MJ said, times two.
    Amazing is right.
    Joe


  • MJ Donnelly gold member
    March 21, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    You are amazing Amera. Best of luck in the contest dear.


    Love and peace,
    mj.


  • PassionsPromise gold member
    March 21, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Indeed I agree with Mairi honey. This is absolutely stunning work.
    Love you
    passions


  • Mairi bheag gold member
    March 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Your formal work is becoming more and more controlled, without losing your "voice". A good trend - and good work here. I have no doubt it will do very well in the contest, Sis.


  • MaMa-2-be-Cindy
    March 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    an intense form, but it creates a wonderufl poem. You wrote a great piece here

    Hope you do well in the contest



    Cindy

1 - 25 of 25