Before I ever met you, I was young and loving
and, you took that from me for eternity
All before you had failed, so you preyed.
I am different because I know you
And...
I fucking Hate you for that!
I fucking Hate ME for that!
Before I ever met you, I sang in the shower
and, you have changed my healing voice
now I find no glory in my sound.
My song aches forever in your grip
And...
I fucking Hate you for that!
I fucking Hate Me for that!
Before I ever met you, I found the beauty in others
and, you turned my scope so all is more narrow.
Every glimpse of life is forever skewed
you are pleased in your deception
And...
I so fucking Hate you for that!
I so fucking Hate Me for that!
Before I ever met you, I looked in strangers eyes
and, now they're all just strange.
Wanderers are now truely lost
my eyes are blind to purity, for now
And...
Ohhhhh, I so fucking Hate you!
Ohhhhh, I so fucking Hate Myself!
Before I ever met you, I drank from the glass of others
and, my freedom is shaken under your influence
no one has penetrated these doors before.
I feel your happiness, as I fall apart
And...
I Fucking Hate you!
I fucking Hate YOU for that!
Before I ever met you, I gave of myself often
and, now I covet my thoughts desperately.
You exploited my secrets every chance
I know you feel better, you stole my strength
And...
I fucking weep for you!
I fucking weep for our daughters!
Before I ever met you, I shared freely
and, now I lock every opening to my soul.
You have taken more from me than I ever thought possible
I will be o.k., but, I fear; you will NOT!
And...
I fucking hold your essence in my hands!
You better hope I am all you thought I was!
I know your truths...
I know your your will...
I know your dreams...
And...
Your fucking scared to death!
Your fucking weak, I hope you lay in fear!
You will never take another God Damn thing from me!
Your presence is toxic...
And...
I am drunk, no more!
Author notes
I thank you so much for this contest. I have identified feelings I have not been able to before this. My husband is an asshole...life is better now that I have admitted that!LOL
A contest entry
- The Hard Truth about Life by JustAnOrdinaryGirl.
300 points, ended April 22, 2008, 15 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - You're Such A Let Down by GypsyEyes.
400 points, ended April 17, 2008, 22 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Sweetie, This Is What Broken Looks Like. by Heartbeatsxfading.
600 points, ended May 20, 2008, 39 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Pre-Written Rhyme Anyone? No Trophies by piccola.
900 points, ended January 28, 30 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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The repetition is a bit much for me and feel it could be just a tad less but at the same time I know it is there to make a point which it does ... thank you for entering this; I think I will send it on for someone to read because I very much relate.
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this is a great example of what my very close friend is feeling right now! this was very good! thank you for entering my contest and i wish you the best of luck! NineTailedFox
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I can fully relate...looking back my ex was a twat to. This is an awesome write, love the lines you repeat. The way you closed is fantastic. Superbly penned, good luck in your contest
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P.S. What is the painting?
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I love this. Hindsight truly is 20/20, but I think yours may even be sharper than that. It's wonderful to read something like this wherein you are so clearly taking all your power back. It makes the reader feel vicariously strong to see you're triumph. And though you seem to fear for the future of your daughters, I can tell you that they will certainly be better off free from the grotesque manipulation and control you speak of.
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I feel all of your poem except the strength.. i am still drunk.. thank you for sharin
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Wow! Just wow. To admit that. To feel that. Its truely amazing
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