Oops, a raindrop!
one more tear
till I surrender
again, my Dear.
Sun’s out-
your eye winked
on my side of the earth.
a blue streaked eyelash
just blinked Love
swept the cloud
trickling smiles
from the floodgate.
The rain is gone
but you are not
Well, well,
hello Lord!
Author notes
2nd edit. Thank you CaliOkie!
struggling with appropriate format . Suggestions?
Comments
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This is captivating. God blinking in sunlight with his (her?) eyelid in blue sky is so creative. As always you have done a lovely job!
Joyce -
I love it. It feels like a raindrop in my eyes
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This is so well structured and demonstrates your skill with vivid imagery and simile that goes to supporting the overall metaphor. It is simple and straightforward which lends to its gentle profundity.
I like the way you use personified nature as the conduit of the Creator's communications, which you express indirectly until the last line. Without that last line it becomes an entirely different poem. You are very skilled at using the end of a poem to modify the beginning of a poem and change it's entire meaning. This leads to multiple readings.
Thanks for this quiet little gem. Very much appreciated.
CaliOkie
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What a great interpretation and form-analysis
Thank you, wonder-Poet!
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