Pylons
By: Star of Atlantis
Mother Earth's, dreams...
are a line of dragons bones
laid out as pylons
with nothingness...
silence, crashes against
what remains of a human soul
water and sand bleach out...
deep, the colour of isolation
civilization’s footprints fade
skies trapped in slow time-lapse...
ever moving, further away
from where i am divided
her pain stretches out forever...
her spines torn through smooth skin
dulled by memory, she forgets us
no one left to breath...
only me, to bare sea
no more damage
all, already done...
Author notes
i chose to wright about the beautiful photo that i truelly adore. thank you for the inspiration
A contest entry
- Plethora Of Options by Play Pretend..
650 points, ended June 10, 2008, 27 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - prewrite contest - round 1 by serenity silvermoon.
929 points, ended October 12, 461 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
please be very detailed in your coments and give me plenty to learn about how you view my piece. thank you.
Comments
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i like
your word play you use the metaphors are beautiful i respect your style you should check out some of my stuff
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i like
your word play you use the metaphors are beautiful i respect your style you should check out some of my stuff
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Good Job!! if you liked the picture go to this website
http://www.stawiarz.com/ thats where i got the picture from.
As for your poem, i can't really say it didn't apply as different images give different inspiration to people, but i did like your interpretation. i thought it clever and different. The only thing i would work on was just the form, i just didn't get it very much, but that may also just be me
Excellent Job and Good Luck!
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