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efflorescence

My soul’s in bloom and I want

to write you a poem with it.

Perhaps to lay it on your pillow

like perfume; you’ll roll over to find

its scent, a sweet musk in morning sun.

Unfold its words like petals, slow,

against your lips, a kiss of happiness,

blush of spring, a taste of twilight rain.


for when we have gone to seed,

I want to sow this poem into hearts


our love will bloom like a flower, 

forever upon this page.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

inspired by quote #1
"If you've never been thrilled to the very edges of your soul by a flower in Spring bloom, maybe your soul has never been in bloom." - Audra Foveo

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 47 of 47

  • Thomas Scott gold member
    June 29, 2008

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    good stuff

    " ... when we have gone to seed ... "
    The metaphor is so clean, so unwavering, ya just gotta love it.


  • Peteskid gold member
    April 2, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    i thought i had commented on this beauty before, well if not, it is a beautiful picture here of caring and deep feelings, scent upon a pillow that might never be forgotten... wonderful...PK


  • Danny Beatty gold member
    April 1, 2008

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    congrats... already remarked on this one ... have a suggestion

    take out last two lines .... add two words in their place as a separate stanza

    "a flower"


    if you do that, link it for submission




    polished, well thought out, unity of ideas and images is outstanding

    deserved gold... I think I beat you in this contest, but I shouldn't have


    • tara wilson gold member
      April 1, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      done - wonderful suggestion, why didn't you tell me that before???huh, huh???

      lmao.


  • Serene
    March 30, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    you have a way with words, so wonderfully blended with a very nice flow and beat! And yet a great piece by you! Well done of a great piece!

    Peace!

    Rena~


  • naked roots
    March 25, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    "I want to sow this poem within hearts;
    for when we have gone to seed,
    our love will continue to flower
    forever upon this page."
    ahhh...yes. What a romantic thought that last stanza is. You are so wonderful at writing the loving poems.
    Excellent.

  • Virgoan
    March 22, 2008

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    I like the flow of this one...so many images to see in its conciseness. The philosophy at heart in this piece is impeccable.

    I have always adore your poems tara. Another excellent piece.

    Love the soft sensuality of the third stanza and the closing stanza is just awesome.

    Keep on writing and sharing

    HENSLEY


  • notorious gold member
    March 22, 2008

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    Every line sounds effortless and elegant. This is real poetry.

    "a taste of twilight rain"
    My favorite line--it's striking and just nice.

    "forever upon this page"
    Ah, could be a double entendre--metaphorically and also your words will be on this page for us to see.


  • In Too Deep1
    March 22, 2008

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    This is really beautiful and sounds so natural. If ever we discover the ability to create our own blooms, this surly would be the mold. This is an enjoyable and delicate writ. I do wish you the best in the comp


  • Victory Gin silver member
    March 22, 2008
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    This is very nice. I like how delicate it is.


  • zochit2me gold member
    March 21, 2008

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    You know what? Just when I think I have read your best love poem...you pull a rabbit outta the hat girl. This is simply beautiful. It left me wanting a love poem left upon my pillow...sigh, yes you always seem to out do yourself with love.

    Becky


  • tony yates silver member
    March 21, 2008
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    superb

    very well written, innovative technique, graceful words - a pleasure to read, well done


  • m2lost24get
    March 21, 2008

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    such true majestic beauty of Springtime's nature, love, and passion meshed well in one. nicely done. It makes me think of someone dear whom I had lost his love cuz of a deeply involved statement that that what i felt as love from my heart to his wasnt returned in the same dimension to sadly be lost evermore. But the love and beauty within your poetic prose grows with each brightening day thank you for entering and many blessings always xxx


  • Swan song gold member
    March 21, 2008

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    Oh my This was just breath taking. You stole my heart with this lovely penning!!!!!"and I'm nothing more than a line in your book..."Play Wink


  • arafura gold member
    March 20, 2008

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    This is so good my friend!

    "our love will still continue to flower,
    forever upon this page."

    Romance is not dead... it lives on in your talented pen. Good luck in the contest!


  • myrataal silver member
    March 20, 2008

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    While Spring enters your joyous chambers ... ...

    winter is rattling
    at my bolted doors ...

    it makes me stand in awe:
    we are living
    in the House
    of
    All Seasons


    Beautiful, beautiful poetry, Tara!

    Love
    Myra


  • artis
    March 20, 2008

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    Unfolding the flesh like a flower bursting

    with succulent dew, its tight ruby center surrounded by pink, to inhale and savor its beauty, to delve into the very taste and texture of its silk petals spread, like a hummingbird drawing out the most life from it while it quivers from my rapid exquisite suckling of its pleasure, and trembles underneath the beating wings of my trembling tripod extension. A most Lovely write.~~Artis


  • Danny Beatty gold member
    March 20, 2008
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    wow! Tara ... this is major poetry .... it is perfect.

    it is entrancing. i am very impressed. oh, and gee thanks, i was hoping to win this contest ... this will get gold


  • cvillelisa
    March 20, 2008

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    Springtime often brings about strong expressions of Love from the poets around here (well there is always lots of Love around here I suppose).

    I think the last stanza is quite a beautiful thought and really the essence of what a love poem is - a gift.

    Good luck in the contest and thanks for the recent visit.

    Lisa


  • Malabu
    March 19, 2008

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    how beautiful...it brings thoughts to me...a love poem
    written...and read year after year...and though we have grown old together...the love we share...Is as vibrant as the day we met...'
    Love it__

    mal


  • Mallig gold member
    March 19, 2008

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    Wowzers! So warm and romantic, this melted a few of my icicles. Good luck in the contest, this is wonderful!

  • Yvette Champ gold member
    March 19, 2008

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    Oh my, the Poetess brings Springtime and the feeling of flowering within in 3D, though the page has a flat face the words trace the shining, the depth that cannot be measured of such bounty that this is beatific, this pure poetry reaches the senses and sighs to the soul, Bravo!


  • Lady Eventide
    March 19, 2008

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    A most beautiful poem from a most beautiful pen. You have the ability to peer into someone's soul and hold it captive. Great job. Good luck.


  • Dalaney gold member
    March 19, 2008

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    this beautiful poem hit my heart like an arrow...

    God, this is fantastic writing.  *hug* Love, Lane 


  • never in his arms
    March 19, 2008
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    This is very inspiring. ! It gives a beautiful fresh feel


  • Randomly Beautiful
    March 19, 2008
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  • Kiran silver member
    March 19, 2008
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    Beautiful!!! This was so romantic. A wonderful spring poem.


  • Namita
    March 19, 2008

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    This is beautiful, Tara... A beautiful beautiful spring poem... Just love the metaphor!! Sensual and passionate writing... too beautiful

    - namita


  • MJ Donnelly gold member
    March 19, 2008

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    "Unfold its words like petals, slow against your lips,
    a kiss of happiness; blush of Spring -
    a taste of twilight rain."


    Oh Tara, this is so powerfully romantic, your best yet dear, such an alluring piece. Best of luck in the contest.


    Love and peace,
    mj.


  • Tam
    March 19, 2008

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    oh dear Lord you've done it again...

    but HOW is it possible that tiny little Tara can pen such epic masterpieces?
    time and again...
    wow...this one rocks the house to it's foundations...
    your poetic voice is second to none Tara...always you have a rich softness that seduces the reader and speaks so eloquently...
    I envy and admire you beautiful poet...your gift fell straight from heaven...
    Blessings! Tammy
    xxoxoox

    p.s. hope you are feeling much better!


  • ukelova
    March 19, 2008

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    romantic

    Hello there!
    This is very nice.
    I’m glad I came along and clicked on your poem. It made me think of how well you used the poetic devices of simile, metaphor and enjambement.

    The utter romance in this poem almost made me swoon; i felt my heart beat faster, almost as if I too was carried along in the passionate desire so beautifully expressed in this excellent free-verse poem.

    Thanks for sharing this beauty with us.

    Bestest wishes for the contest. If your poem is based on expertience and is current, then you are already a winner!


    Have an awesome day,
    BJ.


  • poeticweaver gold member
    March 19, 2008

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    Oh, Yes,

    How I love this passionate kiss, of poetic bliss!
    You weave wonders sweet soul, and thanks for making me

    Love and midnight, I mean light! LOL.
    peace, Timothy aka poeticweaver~


  • Nicolette gold member
    March 18, 2008

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    Aaah, you've found the words too, Tara... a whole garden on this page, a forever spring!! This is so lovely.... so full of life and fragrance and you know how much I like flowers in poetry. Beautiful - petal-soft!

    ~ Nicolette


  • Cup-a-Joe
    March 18, 2008
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    Thud! That's the sound of my jaw hitting the desk.
    Absolutely one of the best I have ever read!
    You rock!
    Joe


  • Night Hope gold member
    March 18, 2008

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    "sweet musk in morning sun."

    "Unfold its words like petals, slow against your lips"

    "a taste of twilight rain."

    These were the lines that made me sigh the most, my Friend. Vivid, intense...yet with a gentle light within, knowing there are blooms tilting towards the warmth. Beautiful. Good luck in the contest, Sweetie. Wanda


  • aliceramone
    March 18, 2008
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    beautiful...should rock the contest!


  • individuality gold member
    March 18, 2008

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    ah the warmth of love intermingled with flowery scents and smiles that reach for the sun's dazzling rays of light


  • Mari Goes gold member
    March 18, 2008

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    You do realize that you write what all of us wish to have written, don't you?


  • kaibab silver member
    March 18, 2008

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    Well this is springtime blushing forever's thrust to greener grace than most imagine...so wonderful Ms>March...just the best in sensual beauty


  • klassy lassy
    March 18, 2008

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    Tara, I think all women would love to feel this way about someone they love, but there are not so many of us who could say it in such a soft way with such a blush of spring. This is warmly romantic and very evocative... ~Karen

  • Suzanne Dia
    March 18, 2008

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    You do have a gift for love/sensual. this is soft and easy ..and there is a sincerity that comes across through that

    always a pleasure to read.




  • CaliOkie silver member
    March 18, 2008

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    The beauty of your poem is like a breath of Spring spread out over the tapestry of the earth, in one place it rattles a leaf, in another it shakes the corn, and in another it stirs ripples on the water. Your poem fans out to the very edges of the soul and even that can not contain it. Love, Spring, the breathless whisper of your poem are things too much to be confined to one soul alone and are spread over many. Stirring one there, shaking another somewhere else and rattling even the most complacent.

    You have been bringing me Spring early this year. I have needed it a great deal and do appreciate it. You have had many Spring themed works lately.

    As always, you make good use of the senses. I smell and taste the Spring in your words, it is the smell and taste of life renewed and with it I find myself walking in an earlier season of my life. Spring is most savored after a lengthy Winter and engenders then the most contentment.

    Thanks for another one!

    Garrison

  • silverfish
    March 18, 2008

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    rich, estral poetic flora. the springtime imagery radiates out like petals. i like the 'twilight rain', too. i think that's the name of my hair conditioner (makes me feel pretty). -silverfish


  • paulcreates silver member
    March 18, 2008
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    A beautiful spring poem. lovely sentiment Tara.
    Paul


  • Peteskid gold member
    March 18, 2008

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    siimply beautiful, soft as a whisper in the night, fervent and grateful...as I suspect someone might feel at the edge of the petal...wonderful...PK


  • philosphyofkate
    March 18, 2008

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    this reminds me of the second part of Adrienne Rich's Twenty One Love Poems. which could possibly be one of my all time favs.

    http://southerncrossreview.org/41/rich.htm


  • misselaineous
    March 18, 2008
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    beautifully written

1 - 47 of 47