You’ve let me bruise
you make me bleed
your heart the blade
I’ve come to in dependence
-don’t ever
leave
me-
Each kiss of metal
with a red drop of iron
brings life to stop [heal]
the pain I’ve fallen for
-you
hold my
blood-
Don’t let me die
unless pain, broken down [fear]
and failure combine together
in order to carve me
-a more
perfect
gravestone-
Author notes
supposed to represent how today's teenage society seems to think cutting is "cool" so they cut... or they want to rid of their pain with more pain and seeing blood.... it's a habit... but they don't seem to want to die... hope you like it
A contest entry
- "they said all teenagers scare the living shit out of me, so darken your clothes and strike a violent pose." invite only. by Ryno.
450 points, ended April 1, 2008, 5 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
This is killer. I loved this write because of the sarcastic, yet purely emotional and strong message and the phrasing, especially in the last two stanzas, sounded like that out of an emo poem, but pumped up lots better more creatively and ingeniously.
You also helped us to realize at the end that yes, this is an issue, and yes, this is something you can in fact die from and, while overlooked a lot, this is something we should work to stop.
Good idea, very creative and thanks for the entry. -
Whoops i forgot my applause...
-
Perfect
It makes me sad that that's the way our society seems to view things... a perfect poem to express it. Sorry I haven't been on in forever! I hope you're not mad...
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