with your hands
over your face,
& i can remember
that most vividly
with everything
else that you left.
"did i ever tell you
the truth
about specks
of dust
on the camera lens?"
he said.
"how they tend to
enlarge your focus
on the little things."
maybe you saw
something i didn't
because the
sage that burned in
your eyes
fizzled out
some time ago.
& i can't
take the absence
in my behavior,
nor could i walk
myself back
to the same sun
i met you under.
why did i keep this image
still,
when the movement
was just right.
Author notes
1. Name: Audri/jah-love
2. Age: 20
3. Amount of Poetic Experience:
i've been writing since i was 12 but i dont honestly think i have enough expierance because i dont think just because i've written for a long time that i am expieranced.
4. Typical/Strongest Style: freeverse; usually vague and abstract in images.
5. Unusual/Weakest Style:
anything to do with form or rhyme or even syllable counts.
6. Favorite Type of Inspiration:
Deviantart.com; or every day things that pop up. latley though that hasn't been happening ha
7. Amount of Multiround Experience: none
8. Some Accomplishments:
than my trophies on my page & my old account not much.
9. One Fact I Don’t Know About You:
although i usually write in a depressing manner
im actually a big goofess
10. Additional Comments You’d Like Me To Read:
i just wanted to say i think this idea is awesome for a contest; you are really organized and good luck in judging. ♥
A contest entry
- project poetry season one [multiround contest auditions] by blackday.
300 points, ended March 21, 2008, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
im never going to miss you again.
Comments
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i think, from the past writes of yours that i remember, this may be the best. i'm hoping he accepts me in his other open contest. then we can frolic around all the rounds together . we can even make a 'secret club' that won't be secret cause i just told everyone through this comment.


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pshh... he said we are alike
we ARE!
'cause we are sistas!!!!
cheer up... sometimes my style matches pu's [in medias res]. it doesn't matter as long as we are true to our poems. ♥<--- and
<--- loves you loads....
and if needs be, let me remind you, you entered before me... and i read your stuff before you did mine. so it could be the other way around, if anyone DID copy. i didn't and i know you didn't either. so, bleh.
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I liked the second stanza with the dust the best. It was the stand out one to me. I think the ending could have been a bit stronger. I was expecting something more profound than that, I guess.
Your style is a lot like Esha's & the whole writing until you end a stanza, not really into the line breaks or significant punctuation. This style isn't my absolute favorite to read, but it's still good.
I do think you have potential to grow & do well, so I'll let you in. Just don't slack off & work. :]
http://allpoetry.com/group/info/project%20poetry

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goosebumps.


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"nor could i walk
myself back
to the same sun
i met you under."
Cracking symbolism I got from this
The sun always rises, always sets - but never EVER in the same way; once it goes down, that's it; like time, like disappointment, like failure.
Well done dear


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this is so unique and the thing about the camera was genius. You are such an amazing poet, and I could read it all day.


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LUVE it... "camera"???


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thank yoU!
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