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Natures Music

The gurgling brook is passing by,
pounding on rocks,
going over the path.
The birds in the trees add some melody
to the streams steady rhythm,
as the girl watches
the trees become chorus girls,
swaying in the wind
in the darkness of night.
Eyes wandering,
she sees the music created
that has never been seen.
Hand running through her hair
she marvels,
tugging at the end of her ribbon
she watches.
Pulling it free
the dark ribbon falls
to be one with the earth
as she runs to be a part of the music.

A contest entry

What do you think?

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Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • Symphony
    April 17

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    Awh this was beautiful - sounds like she was made to be at one with nature - you had such lovely imagery.

    thanks for entering


  • Sunkissed xo
    February 3

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    This is stunning. Truly beautiful. I enjoyed reading every bit of it. Thanks for entering my contest, and best of luck


  • Avatar of Innocence
    September 6, 2008

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    Thanks for entering my contest and being patient with me. Your title should read "Nature's Music." How about more imagery like the bit of brilliance in line 7?


  • fairytalelovestory
    September 1, 2008
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    nice poem good luck

  • piccola silver member
    August 13, 2008

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    this is really a beautifully imaginative work of poetry. Metaphoric and rich in its vocabulary. thank you for entering


  • Florida Sunshine
    August 8, 2008

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    Only those with great insight can really understand a lot of the meaning behind this. I took my daughter and her friends to the park one day, and stood on a ledge and told them to be quiet and listen. ~ I told them nature is singing to them if they would only listen.

    The sound of the flow of a stream as the water cascades against the rocks. Simply beautiful memories floats ~ Clearly this is to stop and smell the roses and enjoying them.

    ~*** Nicely done ~ you certainly put a smile on my face. Thanks so much for entering the contest and sharing your work with me, it was a pleasure to read and review this piece.

    Best of luck to you,
    Florida Sunshine


  • echo-ink
    July 14, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Very beautiful music that nature plays, this was very very nice, enjoyed it. good luck in the contest.


  • xox-emma-xox
    April 3, 2008
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    This is EXACTLY What I was looking for! You combined nature with the presence of humans and it fits perfectly together! Very well done! To the finalist list for you!
    Emma ^_^

  • xox-emma-xox
    March 22, 2008

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    This is a very unique poem...I love your way of writting. I would change nothing about ti. I like the first two lines the most. I feel so calm when I read about nature. I feel so connected. Very well written. Hope to read more on Nature.
    Emma


  • LadyDementia gold member
    March 15, 2008
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    A beautiful poem with a wonderful ending. All the best in the contest with it


  • Melodies
    March 15, 2008

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    I do so love the line where she runs to be part of the music. A delightful poem that has charming imagery.


  • individuality gold member
    March 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    well that last comment was lost so i will say it again

    good piece of poetry - the music rushing along as nature catches life, thank you for taking the time to enter and good luck.

1 - 12 of 12