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Bittersweet

The one who dances in fire
unharmed and calm
smileing with eyes as bright as the embers
I lay beside underserving on this bed.
There is none more beautiful than her
and I weep to know that with me she is alone.
I stand, kiss her soft, sweet lips, and leave.
No note, no explanation, and no goodbye.

Author notes

I'm sure you will call me rude for doing this but am I still an asshole when the explanation is more hurtful than the departure?

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • Aurielle
    March 17, 2008
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    this was good. This was ok. I understood this well.


  • PrInCeSsOfRoCk gold member
    March 16, 2008

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    very sad my friend. but beautiful. i too cannot answer your question...however i prefer to know than not know....because im obsessive and it would drive me insane. but thats just me lol.

    great write.


  • pink-roses gold member
    March 15, 2008

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    I love it. its heavy with imagery and very bittersweet. THere is such an air of desperation and worthlessness, and yet at the same time such romanitism. One of the best I have read so far. I would have to feel sorry for the woman in the poem though - I would be dubious of her perfection and am sure that while poetically the idea is perfect, in reality she would need to know else face blaming herself.

    • just a voice
      March 23, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks I'm glad ya liked the poem. And yes I agree... she would need an explanation... but well, isn't the poem itself an explanation? That was actually the point I was trying to make with this poem but it seems no one has yet or is to come understand it. You understood the poem but not the purpose. The poem itself is the explanation and the apoligy in itself. I guess no one wants to look past the obvious. Maybe I just try to think too much. But anyways I thank you for the comment. It was hella sweet and so are you.


  • kiwigirljacks gold member
    March 15, 2008

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    Wow... beautiful sad poem. I don't know the answer to your question tho... is it worse to know or not to know? Personally I always want to know because I'd tie myself up in knots not knowing.. and there's no closure.. but I'm not sure everyone else feels the same.

    Great write.. tinged with such sadness

1 - 8 of 8