Late afternoon
she walks in sunshine
hair a passionate blaze
eyes of summer skies
with a hint of sadness
even when she smiles
I am intrigued
by the way she sees herself,
her life, her dreams, her end
[especially her end]
and then there is
her hunger
She identifies with meteors
and phoenixes and moths
and wants to go out
in a blaze of glory
yet she is afraid of fire
We talk
[only talk]
about love and sex
fidelity and betrayal
and what the future holds
She listens [some]
smiles that sad smile
then continues straight ahead
and all I can do
is watch her burn...
In a list
A contest entry
- Let's Get the Ink Flowing!!! by Auburn Sunrise.
1800 points, ended March 16, 2008, 30 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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burning bright!
great poem, liked the fire imagery, especially the phoenix which rises from the ashes and the moth which is drawn to the flame. and I liked the final two lines: "and all I can do
is watch her burn..."
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This indeed is an excellent depiction of Allie. Well written.
Buddy
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WOW
DANG that was amazing i can see her in your poem and how she acts you make it easy to see her and all i can say is WOW
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Ah.
You know beauty when you see it, hmmmm?
Beautiful bronze.
Love
Myra
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intense poem zt, from a picture I would have gotten lost in her eyes and you some how are able to focus on the whole... defining something so visual so well in simple little words. Well done my friend
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ps
that girl is absolutly gorgeous -
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Wow!!! Thank you!!!
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wowowowowowwwww that is amazingly beautiful
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beautiful
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Woooooowwww!
I am very... stunned. Nearly into silence.
I read this several times in a row, lingering over the words, the images they invoked, and the general feel of it.
I like how you wrote this whole thing from the perspective of a close observer, never really interfering or making judgements - only watching with curiosity.
I love that this showed me how I come across to other people... a fascinating thing. It's like an honest mirror that speaks! LOL.
Brilliant write! Wonderful entry!
I feel so honored that your first post in ages was for my contest, and about me!!!
Ego swelling... LOL.
Thank you again, dear friend!!! It's wonderful to read your writing again - I've missed you so!
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