Raptured scatters of rainbow memories, broken, detached,
Automatic highs from life's unattainable desires,
Incandescent lies, smothered by the tainted grain of you,
Nothingness allows me to give in to this untamed hysteria,
Barren feelings of insomnia, once again creep into my hell,
Overtaking normality and presenting me with delusions,
Wandering farther away from living, I sink back down,
Heaven seems closer than Earth, but not an angel grows near,
Aspiring for nonsense, anything but depression, my hell,
Leaving behind no reasons to be missed, just tears of shame,
Livid with pulsating fire, igniting my veins from beneath me,
Under the hex of the Devil's eye, scorching my blood like acid,
Can one person destroy another so totally they kill?
Inside my eyes, darkest Evil presents itself to all around,
Never will you see my true feelings, to be evasive is my forte,
And to write with this blood-stained ink gives me sickly delight,
To take something from me, my tortured bird, trapped into thorns,
Imminent is my new reaction, you make me speak this way,
Occult fantasies, raving and wide-eyed my thoughts are sharp,
No limit to the violence wrapping itself around my brain tightly,
Sharp, poisonous feelings, driving their way through my spine,
Crystalline tears roll down my face, like knives into my skin,
Years of torment, sticks and stones, forever permeate my lungs,
Amorous, my desire to punish, torture your pitied soul,
Not a tear for your sickly orchid breath, your timely death,
In what respect do you deserve a penance? Never from me,
Divided by darkness and light, tearing apart my heart,
Evergreen torment, blazing in my evil eyes, rendered broken,
Temptation has taken me over the edge of the cliff of delusional break-down,
Electricity surges, my veins alive with the facade of lies, no feeling,
At the end of the road, not a future have I, nothing but the earth,
Revisiting lost, untold memories, a story of hell-hounds roaming,
Salvation exists no longer, too much has shunned me; I'm dead,
Author notes
Read down the page first letters (Acrostic I think)Rainbow Hallucinations, Cyanide Tears, Just a feeling.
In a list
A contest entry
- Darkwrite Extravaganza Season II, Round I by Immortal Obscurity.
400 points, ended May 19, 2008, 16 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - A fresh start for my world of poetry by x-Black-Butterfly-x.
300 points, ended June 10, 2008, 21 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think of the poem? Be honest, but not too harsh :)
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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I love the way that you can make the lines connect rather than being detatched like most acrostic poems are. Also, I didn't really notice the Acrostic thing until i saw your Author notes so up i scrolled to read it again. Anything that is read twice has some meaning and I'm proud to say you did a great job

Swim -
This was beautiful... It really was, but the length turned me off a bit. I really dislike long poems, because I'm totally ADD and can't pay attention to your poem if it's super-long.
However, I was blown away by your amazing verbiage, and the acrostic adds a touch of originality. Continue in this manner, only not as long, and you could definitely make some noise in this competition. Well done, and good luck.
Laura x
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wow this was really captivating and dark! it had me hooked all the way throughout! I guess you'll prob get through but good luck anyway!


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Gosh, a dark, heart rending write.Revisiting old memeories is always the pathway to hell. A really intense write.Many thanks for commenting on "Undersatnding", Ros
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the emotion that is in this piece speaks so much depth and true heartfelt feelings.
know I am always here for you


1 - 5 of 5




